Mom Offers to Pay 'Cool Black Kids' To Befriend Her Son And Prevent Bullying Via Craigslist

http://elitedaily.com/humor/mom-posts-craglist-ad-seeking-cool-black-friend-bullied-son-gd/806872/

Elite Daily- One concerned New Orleans parent wrote a Craigslist post asking for “cool black kids” to befriend his or her son. The kid is the victim of cruel teasing and has trouble fitting in at school.Best intentions in mind, the parent hopes the boy might be a bit more protected with a few black friends to take him to the movies and out for pizza. At $15 per hour, the job pays well.

This is easily the most logical way I have seen with how to counteract bullying. This needs to go viral right now. After reading this story I decided to look into the ways that 'professionals' are teaching kids how to 'beat' bullies. 

They are telling kids to use humor. If the kid was at all funny he wouldn't be getting bullied in the first place. Know what's funny? A cool black kid standing up for you and beating the bully's face into his brain. I could laugh at that for hours. I get why they tell kids to use humor, but that doesn't mean it works. Nothing pisses off a bully more than outsmarting him. Fists beat wit every single time. 

They are also telling kids to tell the bully to stop calmly. Is that real advice? If I was kid that was getting bullied and some adult told me to do that I would squirt my Capri Sun right in their eye ball. Gee, what a promising concept. Just tell the bully not to bully. Can't argue with that rationale. Know what works better than that? Having a bunch of cool black entourage and being popular. Suck my black associated ass bully! 

I'm not advocating paying for your friends., but sometimes you have no choice. What the kid doesn't know won't hurt him. You gotta do what you gotta do to keep your kid safe, even if it costs you $45 an hour. That's Parenting 101. Black kids are cooler than white kids. That's just a well known fact. Hopefully at some point they actually become 'cool' with each other and Mom can stop paying them. Until then, hopefully he picks up on a some cool kid pointers while it lasts. My advice? Buy the most obnoxious velour sweatsuit you can, it worked for me.

Sneaky funniest part of this is how the kid reacts when a bunch of black kids come up to befriend him out of nowhere. I don't know how that exchange would go, but it would without a doubt be hilarity at it's finest.

P.S. Don't tell me the economy is in the shitter when you can make $15 bucks an hour to babysit a nerd in New Orleans and all you need on your resume is 'black' and 'cool'.

Best case scenario….

Worst case scenario...