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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

MOther Arrested After Leaving Her Three Boys Home Alone To Go Out Drinking

12/12/2014

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http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2871526/Teacher-35-left-three-children-ages-four-12-home-partying-TATTOO.html#ixzz3LiZpnIsw

DailyMail- A 35-year-old teacher has been arrested after allegedly leaving her three young children home alone so she could go partying with her husband and get a tattoo.

Laura Aguero, who earns $79,000-a-year at Middle School 88 in Park Slope, Brooklyn, reportedly abandoned her sons, aged four, five and 12, at her duplex in Sunset Park on Wednesday night.

She then went to a tattoo parlor in Lower East Side to get an inking finished, before going out drinking in a nearby bar, police said. During this time, she got into a fight with her husband, Alfredo Bobe.



Upon first read I thought that leaving a 12 year old boy in charge of his two younger siblings isn't THAT irresponsible. Then I thought about what I was doing at 12 years old. As you get older the memories of those younger years grow dimmer and dimmer. I can pretty clearly remember dissecting a frog, wearing sweater Old Navy vests every single day, and using a full bottle of gel weekly. I had a hair part so mean that it would make Moses proud. That Bob was not capable of being responsible of two other human lives. Pretty sure he was still picking food out of his braces.

Thirteen year olds, however, they are completely capable of babysitting. At thirteen I had realized where my hair line was headed and shaved my head for good. At thirteen I had my first serious girlfriend. Shit, at thirteen I touched my first vagina. If you can convince a girl to let you poke around at her labia like a caveman playing with an iPhone then you can most certainly make sure your brothers don't die for a few hours. That's where this woman messed up. One year too early. The "-teen" at the end of thirteen may seem trivial, but it makes all the difference in the world. Just ask the Jews. You think the ancient traditionalists of Judaism picked the age of the Bar Mitzvah on a whim? Hell no. That's the age of manhood. Speaking loosely of course. 

As a teacher, this woman should have known that. As a teacher making 80K a year she should have been smart enough to hire a babysitter.  I'm pretty foreign to the concept of getting a sitter on short notice, but it can't be that difficult. Loosen up the purse strings enough and you'll have plenty of teenage girls looking to make an extra buck. Lock one of them down, and you can go out, get inked, and slam as many whiskey shots as you want. Being a parent doesn't mean you can't be an irresponsible jackass, it just means you have to plan it out better.
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