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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

People Are Up in Arms Because the Jaguars Mascot Made an Ebola Joke

10/6/2014

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http://www.cbsnews.com/news/ebola-outbreak-jacksonville-jaguars-mascot-criticized-for-ebola-joke-at-game/

CBS- Jacksonville Jaguars mascot Jaxson DeVille is facing criticism over a tasteless Ebola joke during Sunday's game against the Pittsburgh Steelers, CBS Tampa reported.

Full disclusure? I made 3 separate ebola jokes yesterday. Each one was in significantly poorer taste than this. I think you can see the path were heading down here. Is ebola even a real thing yet? Hasn't there only been like 5 cases in the United States so far, and 3 were unconfirmed and based solely on symptoms? Excuse me if I am wrong, but I'm not looking that shit up. Ignorance is bliss. I have a rule with new diseases. They can be funny until they reach a certain point. I call it my '3 degrees of separation' rule. If my friend's sister's roommate contracts ebola I will stop making jokes about it. If my landscaper's cousin's fuck buddy get ebola it is no longer a fair topic for humor.

For instance, I don't even think swine flu was a thing. In my earlier years I was hired to do budgeting for NJ Health Department. I saw millions of dollars devoted to swine flu. That shit never even came close to 3 degrees from me. So there, it's not a thing. Pretty sure anyone that had a common cold during that period of time was diagnosed with swine flu. Sure, some people lost their lives, but people lose their lives to the common cold and a regular old flu all the time. I think this is the same thing. If you go to the doctor with any type of sniffle for the next two months you better be prepared to leave that bitch with ebola. That's just how it works.

Really don't see the big deal with this sign though. Should an employee of a professional football team be making light of a 'dangerous disease' for sport? Probably not. However, that's why he's a mascot. No one looks to a mascot for their moral fiber. If he was a fan of rational decision making he wouldn't have spent the last 18 years wearing a fucking Jaguar head.

I don't even know why the Jaguars have a mascot. You should have to average at least 5,000 people at your home games before they let you have a furry animal running around trying to get the crowd excited. Worst job ever by the way. Florida is so goddamn hot it's unbearable. Plus theres probably only like 3 sections in the place that have enough people to get loud. The mascot probably spends more time running around than Blake Bortles on 3rd and long.

Another interesting perspective here. Are we positive that towels don't carry ebola? I think its pretty safe to say they do (if ebola is a real thing). Would you take a towel from someone that is a known ebola carrier? Yeah, I didn't think so. Thanks for the heads up Jackson DeVille. You may have just saved a whole bunch of lives yesterday.  If you see this guy in the street make sure to salute him. He's a hero. Just don't take a towel from him…or haircare tips.
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