Remember when R. Kelly somehow stole the show - on the night that Kobe said farewell to the NBA with a 60 point game winning performance - by posting a picture of him watching the game on an airplane television that was inexplicably mounted to his wall?
Well, it certainly took him awhile, but he found just about the perfect way to say 'Hi' to all the haters...
Sure, everyone else got to watch the Mambo go out in all his glory on 50+ inches of LED while R. Kelly was leaning forward and undoubtedly jeopardizing his retinal health by squinting at an iPad XL. However, he kind of makes all of us look like piss ants when he can get people to pay hard earned money to come watch him watch a month old game as he sits in a recliner looking up at his own personal movie screen. That's the ultimate "I'm glad you guys had your fun on the internet, but I am still better than you" move. I actually respect the fact that he can do what he did, but I am a little bit upset that he made everything feel so real, you know? You couldn't have let us have this one Kel's? Just had to remind everyone that the guy that pissed on a middle schooler is still more beloved than them? Had to emasculate hundreds of thousands of fans by shedding light on the fact that they helped fund your mansion full of mini-TV's? Come on man. We know you won. You made 'I Believe I Can Fly'. You made the remix to 'Ignition'. You've accomplished more than we ever will. We waved that white flag a lonnnng time ago. That's why it's fun to try to build ourselves up by taking you down a notch. Way to ruin the little makeshift 'Fiesta' we were having at your expense. Now we have to go back to our humdrum lives with the realization that we are lesser people than the guy we spent all night mocking while still wondering why you watch sports on a portable DVD player.
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