Roman Harper Is Renting Out His Apartment The Night Of The Super Bowl For A Cool $5,000 That's Going To Charity
Uproxx- This is a football fantasy come true – right in the heart of uptown Charlotte!
This year, for one night only, I’m putting my place up on Airbnb while I head to San Francisco to play the Denver Broncos at Super Bowl 50. In celebration and for those fans who are not able to attend the big game, my family and I are offering the chance for a lucky guest to spend the night! For those who book, we will donate all proceeds to Harper’s Hope 41 Foundation (501c3) that helps enable us to prepare today’s youth for tomorrow’s challenges, and Airbnb will match the proceeds.
On Sunday, February 7, a super fan and their super guest will be able to feel right at home in my living room while I play in this year’s main event. Kick back on my sofa while watching Super Bowl 50 on our 70 inch TV. Upon arrival, feel free to check out our outdoor junior Olympic pool with an expansive deck and deluxe courtyard, or our 4,000 s.f. spa-inspired health club with yoga room and complimentary fitness classes. As evening approaches, prepare your football finest and take advantage of the kitchen — it’s where I (and my mom) spend most of the time preparing for big games!
Oh, and did I mention, I will throw in a signed football, too.
You and your guest will also be able to experience our home’s amenities which include:
-24-hour Concierge staff providing excellent resident service
-Multi-purpose basketball and tennis court
-Elegant 50th Floor SKY Lounge
-8th Floor Cyber Bar
-Billiards lounge and café with demonstration kitchen
-Private HDTV screening room with surround-sound
Let me be clear, I love Roman Harper. He helped bring a Lombardi Trophy to New Orleans and I will never forget that. I also love the fact that he's so involved in charitable efforts, and so in tune with the fans that he's willing to rent out his place of residence for one of them (and a guest) to enjoy the game. With that said, this offer fucking sucks. Don't get me wrong, the place itself sounds like it's definitely worth $5,000. It's just not worth $5,000 on Super Bowl Sunday. Not only is one night not enough to get the full experience and make use of all the amenities, but who the fuck wants to watch the Super Bowl with ONE other person?! That sounds like the lamest night ever, regardless of your accommodations. What does a single man do? Bring a friend? How many wings can two dudes possibly eat at the demonstration kitchen? How many beers can they possibly slug at the SKY lounge and Cyber bar? Only a true asshole would take advantage of the health club and the complimentary fitness classes on the most gluttonous day of the year. Two guys hanging out in that apartment on Super Bowl Sunday? According to my calculations, the most they are having is $1,500 worth of fun.
Let's be real, if you put up that much money for one night of room and board then you better do so with the intent of making use of every room and the headboard. That means the best case scenario is paying $5,000 to watch the Super Bowl with your girlfriend or wife, and ONLY your girlfriend or wife. I don't even have a girlfriend or wife, but I would be more likely to spend $5,000 to get away from my hypothetical significant other than I would be to spend $5,000 on a gorgeous apartment to share with her when all I want to do is get drunk, fat, and watch football. Thanks, but no thanks. If I had 5K to frivolously fling around then I would be glad to drop it on a night of debauchery in Roman Harper's crib...as long as that night wasn't February 7th.
P.S. White couches on Super Bowl Sunday? More egregious than white outfits after Labor Day...