Seems Strange For Justin Tucker To Be Bragging About A Missed Field Goal, But I Like Where His Head's At
Whoa, whoa, whoa....is this a thing that's socially acceptable now? Is bragging about things you were close to accomplishing the new fad? Did Brandy lie to us? Does "almost" actually count now? Is Justin Tucker gloating about missing an 85 yard field goal like any asshole couldn't get out of bed hungover, travel down to their nearest high school football field, and also miss an 85 yard field goal a sign of things to come? Looks like none of my previous sexual partners have anything to complain about because - by my estimation - I was always thiiiiiiis close to giving them the best climax of their life and apparently I get to claim ownership of that now. This could change contract negotiations forever. Just imagine how much longer lists of accolades would be if they included moral victories and/or slight failures? Shit, the Buffalo Bills would have been a dynasty. Jerry West would be the most decorated player in NBA history. Dare I say that Kevin Durant might still be in Oklahoma City if that were the case? You could basically double the length of everyone's resume by adding the collection of things of which they were nearly successful. I was a pretty good hockey player growing up. Who's to say I wasn't a proverbial crossbar away from going pro? According to Justin Tucker that answer is nobody, so hopefully my unforeseen boost in personal triumphs helps me as much during bar top banter as it helped a field goal kicker during his strong arming of a 4 year, 16.8 million dollar deal out of the Baltimore Ravens.