So Why Exactly Has Russell Wilson Been Exempt From Any Blame Whatsoever in Super Bowl XLIX?
Taking a look at the common post Super Bowl headlines you will notice a lot of things. Tom Brady may be the greatest quarterback ever. Bill Belichick is a genius. Richard Sherman is a moron. Malcolm Butler, the unlikeliest of heroes. Julian Edelman putting on a studly performance despite possibly playing with a concussion. Gronk being the coolest dude ever. I mean, it's literally impossible to hate Gronk unless spend your Friday nights memorizing Bible passages like Russell Wilson. Pete Carroll may be responsible for the single dumbest decision ever made. Seriously, talk about life giving you lemons and turning them into a big bag of lemon flavored shit.
The topics you read about had a variance as high as Johnny Manziel's blood-alcohol content.
One thing you probably didn't read about is how Russell Wilson was responsible for one of the dumbest interceptions ever thrown. I'll preface this by saying Malcolm Butler made an amazing play. No one can deny that. I'll also say that Wilson shouldn't have been put in that position. As far as who is more responsible for the outcome of the play, I would think Pete Carroll shoulders more of that burden. Maybe that's why Wilson has been given a pass. If they scanned the camera back to Pete and he was butt naked with his dick tucked into a perfect mangina, the first topic of discussion on Monday morning would still be his play call and not his alternative lifestyle. So I suppose it is easy to overlook who actually threw the interception, on a slant route, of all plays.
The nature of football is that the quarterback gets too much credit when a team wins, and too much blame when a team loses. At least that's how it used to be. That's why more often than not the SuperBowl MVP trophy is given to a team's offensive signal caller. Take a look back though history and you will see that some pretty pedestrian quarterback performances that were deemed MVP worthy. Think about much credit Tom Brady has been given, and rightfully so, for a dynamic 4th quarter in which he completed 13 of 15 passes for 124 yards and two touchdowns. Now think about what the narrative would be had the Seahawks let Marshawn Lynch carry them in to the end zone and subsequently to a second consecutive Super Bowl victory. You can bet your ass we would be talking about Tom Brady's two interceptions on the biggest stage the sport has to offer. We would be talking about how Tom Brady went from 3-0 in Super Bowls to 3-3 in Super Bowls real fucking quick. So why does Russell Wilson fly under the radar for blindly launching the ball in to the hands of an awaiting defender with a Super Bowl victory not only on the line, but almost a certainty given the success of his running back. Horrendously bad play call? Yes, but if Russell Wilson throws that ball away you've still got two chances two score, one time-out, and one of the hardest people in the world to tackle. I know Russell is a mere three years into his career and already has two Super Bowl appearances. However, if we are going to give him credit for leading a team whose success is based primarily on a strong defense and a stellar running game, than he should be taking some criticism when he throws a terrible interception and costs his team a championship.
In case you hadn't realized, not the world's biggest Russell Wilson fan. I am secure enough with myself to admit this is biased. I'm not of the school of thought that every quarterback has to be a loud, boisterous type. In fact, quite the opposite is true. Some of the leagues most decorated quarterbacks have been very understated in their demeanor, but toughen up a bit Russ. For Christ sake, when you are making Tom Brady, a guy that has never been touched and not thrown a complete hissy fit, look like a bad ass you have some image reshaping to do. Brady has hair plugs and has been slinging the most feminine shoe product in recent history with his involvement in Ugg's. Compared to Wilson, and his choir boy image, he may as well be riding Harley Davidson's, getting into bar fights, and dating strippers. When I would rather have a beer with Tom Brady, there is a serious problem at hand.
I like to think I wasn't the only one turned off by Wilson's tears and religiously inspired post game speech after beating the Packers in the NFC championship. My fucking God, quite literally, a higher power was not responsible for his four interceptions and his multitude of attempts to throw away the game. Can we just keep God out of it? Religion has no place on the gridiron. You want to kneel and give a shout out to the guy in the sky after a touchdown? By all means. But can we not go all 'Jehovah's Witness' on national television with the religious propaganda? Where was God on Sunday Russ? Was he the guy that had one too many beers during the Katy Perry halftime show? Did he eat one too many wings and pass out in a food coma? Maybe he's just a big Tom Brady fan? Should have sucked off a few more priests, alter boy. He certainly didn't have your back, 'Angels In The Outfield' style, when you threw an unGodly interception to cap off an otherwise mediocre performance. If God has a hand in the outcome of everyone's career path then Ryan Leaf should be using the Bible to roll his joints. Matt Leinart should be using holy water to clean his forever unclean dick. Rex Grossman should be using a cross to cut his wrists. Quite frankly, it discredits all the hard work and decision making that have made Russell Wilson such a successful quarterback to say that football is all part of God's plan. Like he is up in the clouds running the NFL like his own personal WWE pay per view.
I'm sorry, but this playlist is just so Russell Wilson it hurts. I genuinely can't get behind my quarterback if this is what he listens to to get himself amped. The rest of the world is bumping Eminem, 'Til I Collapse', and Wilson's blood really gets pumping to Marvin Gaye and Barry White. The only place blood should be pumping to this playlist is to a massive erection, because this is a after-hours playlist if I have ever seen one. If I was a Patriots player and you showed me this before the game, I would genuinely question whether Russell Wilson was trying to beat me or fuck me. Whether he was trying to throw TD's on me, or just throw a D on me. I'll tell you what, Wilson sure as shit 'Signed, Sealed, and Delivered' that interception on his final possession. There is just no way that anyone could possess a killer instinct with Michael Jackson's adolescent boy inspired lyrics stuck in their head. I criticized the story when it first came out, but maybe Wilson's teammates concerns over his 'blackness' were legitimate. An entire playlist (not shown) and the only hip hop song is by Macklemore? The most edgy song is not only performed by someone whiter than the local Starbucks, but is the only song that keeps this playlist from being fit for a 60 year old woman. Can't rock 'Beats By Dre' and not have one song representative of the current delegation of black rap artists. Be better Russ. Do better.
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