Next Impulse- On Monday, someone made the unfortunate mistake of parking in Ohio State coach Urban Meyer’s parking spot.
Not one to let such a thing go unpunished, Buckeyes running back showed what Meyer decided to do to the person who took his spot; he parked directly behind the offending car and blocked it in.
I want to hate this move so bad, but it's impossible to. As a man, the biggest sign of respect is your own parking spot. You may not like Urban Meyer as a person, but you have no choice to admit how much he has accomplished. He has earned the right to not have to look for parking, which is basically the nicest compliment you can give someone. Looking for parking is for average people. Winding through a parking lot like it's a maze. Peeking around corners only to see the ass end of a smart car taking up what you thought was a clear space. Going head to head with cars to see who will budge first. Waiting for people to walk back to their car and hope they are leaving. It's terrible. Every last second of it. In a word, it's dehumanizing.
That's why you have to put your foot down if you are Urban Meyer. You park right behind that negligent bastard and don't even say a word about it. Just double park and go on about your day. Sure, there is going to be a moment where that person comes back to their car, and you know what their reaction is going to be? Nothing. You can't do shit when Urban Meyer is parked behind you. Are you going to approach him about it? Hell no. You will politely walk around the facility until 30 hours later when Urban is done watching game tape. You don't like it? Take an Uber. Hell, I wouldn't put it past Urban Meyer to take an Uber and just leave his car there for a week. I wouldn't put anything past someone that is responsible for a move this vindictive. Sometimes you just got to reinforce the hierarchy on campus, and you can't live up to your reputation if you don't make sure your act of retribution doesn't take the term 'power move' to an absolute extreme.
P.S. If this guy didn't even attempt to do a 1,000 point turn to get out of there then he lost what little respect he already had.