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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

The Amount Of Team Meetings Dez Bryant Has Missed Is Between Him And God, Says Jerry Jones

10/4/2016

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LBS- Dez Bryant missed an MRI, a treatment session and at least one team meeting last week when he was avoiding bad news about his knee injury, and a report later claimed the meeting was one of as many as 40 Bryant has missed in his Dallas Cowboys career. To find out if there is any validity behind that report, the media asked Jerry Jones about it on Monday.

Not surprisingly, Jones stopped short of vehemently denying that Bryant has missed several meetings. But if we want an answer as to how many, we’ll have to look to the man upstairs.


“On the face of them, yes, I would say (the reports) are incorrect, because only God knows how many of his meetings one way or another he has missed,” Jones said, via Michael David Smith of Pro Football Talk.




​“Hey Jerry, word is that Dez Bryant has skipped upwards of 40 team meetings as a member of your organization. What do you have to say about his poor attendance record?”

“Oh, we actually put Jesus Christ in charge of roll call so you can contact him if you have any further questions.”

That Jerry Jones, what a smooth son-of-a-bitch. No need to punish your enigmatic wide receiver for conduct that may or not be detrimental to the team dynamic when he will be properly disciplined for it in the afterlife. Who cares that the Cowboys brass undoubtedly knows exactly how many times Dez Bryant has missed meetings over the years? If Jerry says that only the most high is privy to that information then only the most high is privy to that information. After all, you can't keep debating the elderly after they invoke the name of their Lord and Savior. Doesn't matter if you think that the elderly person in question is a slime-ball that's just trying to avoid answering to some questionable, preferential business practices behind closed doors. It would be downright blasphemous to openly presume that he was exploiting the name of the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit solely to save himself a headache. So if the media wants to know how many times the X-Factor put his own personal desires above the betterment of the team then they can find the nearest Church, say a little prayer, and hope that the all-knowing is nice enough to bless them with that knowledge, because - quite frankly - it's no one else's to share. Amen for organized religion, am-I-right?!?
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