The Atlanta Falcons Hiring A Drunk To Fill Their Void At Offensive Coordinator Feels Oddly Fitting

The #Falcons and #Bama OC Steve Sarkisian are finalizing a deal, sources said. So this is happening. They had talked earlier this winter

— Ian Rapoport (@RapSheet) February 7, 2017

There are coaches on the #Falcons staff learning about Steve Sarkisian via the media.

— Josina Anderson (@JosinaAnderson) February 7, 2017

I'll tell you what, when there were about nine minutes left in the Super Bowl I would have told you that losing the coordinator responsible for the league's most versatile, prolific offense and replacing him with a guy who drank his way out of a college job would be a huge drop-off. Now? I'm not so sure. I think Kyle Shanahan is an amazing football mind and all, but I'm pretty certain that even the coach that hydrates with the hard stuff wouldn't have been feeling loose enough to call 5 step drops on 3rd and 1 with a championship on the line. Heading to Atlanta while they are drinking away the pain of a soul crushing choke job provides Steve Sarkisian an environment that is about as conducive to his sobriety as going cougar hunting with Lane Kiffin, but - even with a solid buzz - I think he'd be smart enough to run the ball and milk the clock while up 8 in obvious field goal range.

I guess I shouldn't make too many jokes because everyone deserves a second chance and alcoholism is a very serious disease (that most of us managed to self-correct sometime after college), but it seems CRAZY that the dude who was canned from a university that's no stranger to scandal for turning his desk into a top shelf liquor cabinet just got gifted with the opportunity of a lifetime. Something tells me he switched his cocktail of choice to the blood of Christ, because Steve Sarkisian has been blessed to join a Super Bowl team whose hangover should certainly make him feel right at home...