The Austrian Hockey League Champions Accidentally Broke The Trophy Just Minutes After Winning It5/19/2016
BarDown- EC Red Bull Salzburg has dominated the Austrian Hockey League since 2007. Since ’07, they’ve won the Austrian Championship a total of six times, including back-to-back championships three separate times during that span. They won the championship again this season, but for a team that has won it so many times in the past nine years, you’d think they know how to carry the trophy by now.
Nothing like a quick reminder, after winning your 6th championship in 9 years, that your flat out dominance of the Austrian Hockey League is just that - flat out dominance of the AUSTRIAN Hockey League. Impossible to let the size of your trophy case go to your head when it's contents are only a gravitational pull away from assembly being required. I have to apologize to my man Kutlak for the headline, because saying that this guy "broke" the trophy is simply disingenuous. That fucking thing fell apart faster than Phil Kessel's nutrition plan. This has nothing to do with EC Red Bull Salzburg's perceived clumsiness, because that Cup's lack of durability is nothing more than an indictment of the league from which they won it. I don't know what the Red Bull/Suzuki sponsorship money is going towards, but if you want your league to maintain any respectability then it's probably best to put some assets towards making sure the ultimate prize isn't been held together by whatever held my 1st grade tee-ball trophy together. Just saying, might be a tough sell to recruit some overseas talent when they see a guy that should be triumphantly hoisting a trophy over his head as part of a Kodak moment frantically trying to jam the pieces back together like a frustrated father on Christmas morning. I don't think the guys playing puck over in Austria have any unrealistic preconceived notions about their level of competition, but it would still be nice to let them celebrate a championship without promptly being made aware of how insignificant it is. On the bright side, it will definitely be less physically taxing to guzzle beer out of it..
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