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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

The Fact That I Can't Immediately Dismiss This Story Tells You All You Need to Know About Kyrie Irving

6/20/2019

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Picture

Wow. Gottlieb says Kyrie Irving walked up to Brad Stevens before a film session and said, “What does the word government mean to you” upon Brad saying “good morning”

This is next level fake woke and weird pic.twitter.com/r5FGC5tj2p

— King Brycen □ (@BrycenNFL) June 18, 2019

He essentially tapped around the question to avoid falling into some weird word trigger response trap.

He instead asked Kyrie what it meant to him. Kyrie said “control”. Just a weird exchange

— King Brycen □ (@BrycenNFL) June 18, 2019

To be as clear as the day is long, let me first say that the only person I'm less likely to take at their word than Doug Gottlieb is...well...Doug Gottlieb when he's making a guest appearance on the Colin Cowherd show. To put it lightly, I'm suspicious of this story's validity.

That said, it speaks volumes to the quirkiness of subject that my suspicion is based entirely on the source, as opposed to the flat out foolishness of a tale that would seem tall if not for featuring the NBA player who is most likely to come off as dumb in an exaggerated effort to sound smarter than he is. As someone that fears Kyrie Irving might come to Brooklyn and be late to the Nets' home opener because he let the universe guide his path to Barclays Center after turning off his location to go MIA to the all-knowing eye, I can't entirely dismiss this as fake news. Whether or not it's true is actually kind of irrelevant, because it being even mildly believable in a "sounds about right" sort of way is a problem in and of itself.

I don't know for sure that he was walking around the Celtics' facilities asking people for their personal meaning of 'government' like he was conducting a verbal admissions test to Tinfoil Cap University, but Kyrie Irving is way out there and it's not because he accidentally stepped off the edge of the Earth. Rather, it's because, much like someone opening their eyes as wide as possible to fight off exhaustion, he tries so incredibly hard to be woke that he's ironically one step away from being asleep at the wheel. Just his Instagram captions alone are proof of someone who makes for an odd mix in being a type of pretentious that you can't help but pity. 

Obviously he's still an insanely talented basketball player, despite what his percentages from this postseason might show, but he'sone that is just a little too close to giving up his hoop dreams to pursue the type of "truths" outlined in rarely viewed but oddly convincing YouTube videos. 
View this post on Instagram

My Intuitive Truth: I am grateful for my time capsule on this Motherly Earth. I am grateful I am constantly in search for more knowledge about life, the world, and myself. I am Learning the Purpose I have in this Universe. I will only use it for greatness. I Look up and look within, there are angels, guiding spirits, and synchronicities all around me. I Awaken to the beauty of growth and patience. I Love and Live freely. Happiness is inside. 27, stamp it!! Mom I love you. To my family â–¡â–¡Power is inside.

A post shared by Kyrie Irving (@kyrieirving) on Mar 23, 2019 at 8:28pm PDT

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