The 'ICEE' Chugging Contest Held By This Minor League Baseball Team Was As Entertaining As It Was Concerning

Our man was not going to be denied in the Icee Chugging Contest. No matter the cost.

No. Matter. The. Cost.#BrainFreeze #AutoZoneParkFun pic.twitter.com/swg1LMPP4P

— Memphis Redbirds (@memphisredbirds) June 11, 2017

I am not going to sit here and pretend that I didn't laugh when that kid realized that his oversized melon was paralyzed by the pain of the expedited ingestion of a sugary frozen beverage, so I'm not going to discourage you from doing so either. However, let's make one thing very clear - what we all inevitably laughed at was nothing short of child abuse. That poor ginger is about 8 dozen bouts with brain freeze away from accepting it's existence, and some minor league ball club exploited his child-like innocence (i.e. negligence) for mid-inning entertainment.

Now, I don't think that temporarily feeling like you're going to turn to stone has any lasting effects on kids or my parents could have taken '7-Eleven' to court before I hit middle school. Still, the Memphis Redbirds took advantage of children by giving them free treats, and - whether there was a nondescript van present or not - I'm pretty sure that's universally frowned upon. That doesn't make this particular scene unfunny, but I speak for ever person that used to be stupid, stubborn brat that repeatedly saw their short life flash before their eyes after drinking a slurpee in seconds when I say that this was just plain mean.