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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

The Kings Were Bad Boys So Now They Get Special Guest Speakers

6/3/2015

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OC Register- Kings general manager Dean Lombardi intends to bring in guest speakers and educators to talk to players and staff members about domestic violence and drug issues, Lombardi told reporters Tuesday afternoon.

The Kings have been in the news twice in the previous eight months for off-ice issues. Slava Voynov was arrested in October and charged with assaulting his wife. He faces one felony count of spousal battery and his trial is set to start July 7. In April, Jarret Stoll was arrested in Las Vegas on suspicion of drug possession. According to the police report, Stoll admitted to possessing cocaine, but Nevada officials have yet to decide on possible charges.



Luuuucky! Nothing is better than a special guest speaker. You get to take a class off and not pay attention. Send notes back and forth with your classmates. Make remarks and jokes under your breathe. Maybe just take a little nap if you are feeling exhausted. It's just a complete nothing day. A space eater, if you will. Just when you thought being a professional athlete couldn't be any cooler they are getting days off from watching film to have some old, drunk, wife beaters tell them about how badly they fucked their lives up? 

You know how much locker room material that is worth? They get to condescendingly point and laugh at Jarret Stool. Maybe hang up a D.A.R.E. tee shirt in his locker. Nothing perpetuates the stereotype that hockey players are just big kids like bringing in people to talk at them like they are 10 years old. I mean, look at the crimes we are talking about. Slava Voynov whacked his wife around pretty good but he's not currently with the team. I am pretty sure that Jarret Stool knows that trying to bring bunch of Molly and blow into a Vegas club isn't a good life decision. You could have a life coach travel with him in the offseason and the only thing that would change is that he would do the drugs before he went into the club. In reality he was just the packing mule for the rest of the team. It's just completely unnecessary, but hilarious at the same time. A bunch of grown ass degenerates being schooled on life's vices. 

P.S. Drew Doughty is probably worthy of a 1-on-1 tutorial.
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