The Most Surprising Aspect Of Ryan Lochte Making Up An Armed Robbery Is That It Shouldn't Be Surprising
Hmm. An exceedingly unintelligent super jock traveled to a foreign country, changed his appearance for shock value, went out and got super drunk, destroyed property, pissed whereever he wanted, started an unnecessary fight, and then exaggerated the details to make him look like a bad ass victim instead of a belligerent instigator when he woke up in the morning? You know, as crazy as it seems to take it in stride when hearing a story about a decorated American Olympian fabricating an armed robbery, I think we kind of have to accept that this was closer to a foregone conclusion than an Earth shattering realization. The final headline might appear to be shocking breaking news, but the nuts and the bolts of the story fit seamlessly together the whole damn time.
In fact, I would go as far as saying that anyone that's ever been to college has been told a similar tale by someone that they assumed was stretching the truth. Obviously those stories more than likely didn't result in an international incident in which their friends were being held captive in the 3rd world. Still, the point remains - hyper-masculine drunk dudes have a way with misrepresenting the truth in biased ways which make them seem "cooler" to the recipient. Not for nothing, but refusing to get down on the ground and responding with a passive-aggressive "whatever" when you have a gun pointed at you is infinitely more "cool" then kicking down gas station doors as a bunch of stumbling, shitfaced buffoons. That's not to justify Ryan Lochte's behavior, because Brazil has enough problems without some mindless dickhead magically concocting more. However, it is to say that I think we can all see where he's coming from because - unfortunately - we have all been granted the misfortune of hanging out with someone like him before.
P.S. First step to not getting caught in a lie, don't physically carry the "lie" on your person...