The Penguins And Capitals Put On A 15 Goal Display That Was An Unbelievably Entertaining Insult To The Sport
I'm no stick in the mud that has derives pleasure from taking a wet blanket and using it to smother the fun out of ridiculously eventful sporting events. I know the headline may read that way, but the truth is that I have a shameless amount of love for 8-7 shootouts (as long as they don't end in shootouts). I just think it's only fair to acknowledge that a game featuring nine goals scored in twenty minutes of professional hockey required defense that can only be described as offensive and goaltending that was so counterproductive that it would be better defined as 'net-under-minding'. Obviously there was a ton of firepower on display, but it burned a hell of a lot quicker once it got caught by the wind that two of the best teams in the sport outright refused to throw caution to.
That doesn't mean I can't enjoy a performance that may have singlehandedly increased scoring enough to silence those that want to tear up the very fabric of the sport by making the nets bigger. It doesn't mean I don't think the novelty of a scoring output that would put the point totals of the Los Angeles Rams to shame wasn't worth the torching of the two GAA's that it ultimately destroyed. It just means that what took place in Pittsburgh last night was basically the athletic equivalent of reality television in the sense that it was so unapologetically a mockery of itself that it became a more captivating version of itself.
Even Roberto Luongo couldn't turn away, and I think he was trying to be funny just as much as he was trying to laugh himself through the second-hand pain of watching two of his peers get their dicks kicked in....