No homo but I would totally get a vagina so LeBron James could put his penis in it. No homo. Say it enough times it's got to be true, right? Everyone together now, 1...2...3...NO HOMO!
Listen, I am not in a hurry to drop this whole white male thing I got going for me. Having a womb doesn't even sound cool. Like, the word 'womb' itself doesn't even make it seem desirable. Regardless, if I absolutely had to get a womb, I guess I wouldn't mind LeBron James putting a baby in it. Don't get me wrong, I hate LeBron James. Absolutely phenomenal player on the court. Completely insufferable off the court. Getting taken to Pound Town by 'The King' would have nothing to do with some undying admiration I have for him. However, consider this. The only thing better than growing up to play professional sports is having a kid that grows up to play professional sports. I would use that seed for all the super human genes that it's worth. Hell, I'd piss on a stick and at the first sign of a positive result I would murder LeBron and start prepping for my payday. Just spend the kid's entire childhood helping him unlearn the personality traits of his father, and circling all the cars I'll buy when he finally makes it to the league. I would send Calipari a picture and a DNA test the second I started showing. Really get that money train in motion if you know what I am saying. That kid would have a one year scholarship before I even crapped him out of my newly constructed baby grower. So, yeah, fuck it. If I was going to get some lady parts I would totally let LeBron fuck them, but if he pulled out I would slit his throat. No homo. P.S. This kid definitely just found the prettiest, most photoshopped picture of LeBron just so this post would seem less gay, right? Even found one that covered the hairline. Veteran move.
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