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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

This On-Site News Reporter In Minnesota Just Pissed Away A Golden Opportunity

12/16/2015

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Hey Adam, I am glad you are upholding your obligation to society by calling 911 on the bank robber that literally just ran by you, but you didn't uphold your duty to your employer so sorry bud, but you're fucking fired. Admittedly, I don't know much about on-site reporting, but I do believe that there is someone behind that camera. Granted, we are talking about Minnesota here, so it is very possible this guy was just standing outside in the cold by himself with a tripod. Still, the only way you get out of Minnesota as a newscaster is by providing a live feed into the only newsworthy thing that has happened in Minnesota this decade. If you're responsible for making a story that originates in Minnesota go national then pack your bags, because you just bought yourself a one way ticket out of Middle America. So Adam, maybe find a way to follow the 'Breaking News' that just sprinted past you, somehow undetected, wearing a ski mask and carrying a duffel bag full of cash. If you really want to advance your career you shouldn't be chasing a grammatical correct send off, you should be chasing your big break. 

We didn't tune in to see you be a good person, we tuned in to be entertained. Well actually, the people that are tuning in are probably only doing so because they only have basic cable, but captivating content is still a plus. You had one shot, one opportunity, and instead of capturing it you stopped recording and ran to a pay phone, because cell phone service in Minnesota undoubtedly sucks. I don't want to say your not cut out for this business Adam, but your demo reel speaks for itself.
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