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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

This Shirt Makes Me Feel So, Sooo Bad For The City Of Cleveland

4/18/2016

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I want to hate on this shirt so bad. I want to talk about how it doesn't make any sense at all. Point out the fact that LeBron James greatness has only been defined in June twice, and zero of those times were when he was wearing a Cavaliers jersey. Mock this Ohio-based company for completely ignoring the fact that the team that won 73 games this season is the very same one that popped celebratory bottles right under their nose last season. Call attention to how ridiculous it is to compare one player - whose made a habit out of losing in the NBA Finals - to an entire team's historic, season long feat.

Unfortunately I can't do any of that. I know, I know. This shirt is so incredibly dumb that it deserves all the ridicule in the world, but I simply have too much of a heart to tell them. I may despise the entire premise of this shirt and the person that it irrationally glorifies, but I don't despise Cleveland. In fact, I pity Cleveland. All they have left is LeBron James. Kyrie Irving wants out and Kevin Love should want out. The Browns are the only team in the league that has/had one - never mind two - talented players that flat out chose a life of drugs and alcohol over an NFL career. The Cleveland Indians only make the papers when an ESPN analyst openly mocks their prejudice logo. Their entire wagon is hitched to the guy that only signs one year contracts, and subliminally suggests he's leaving town every 3 months or so. If I was a Cleveland sports fan I would probably suck the LeBron's dick too. I would probably think a t-shirt that features math that a dyslexic kindergartener would be able to tell you is wrong would be a cool thing to wear too. I would probably show my insecurity by downplaying all of Golden State's accomplishments too. They have no choice. It's either that or accept the fact that the Cavaliers have next to no chance to win a championship, and that would be an admission that they literally have nothing left to live for. I don't want that blood on my hands, 
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