This Video Of A Girl Assaulting A Guy On Spring Break Without Spilling His Drink Is Why Double Standards Exist

I'm not going to be the person to say that a woman can't do something because she's a woman. Not me. Not in 2017. Everyone pined for a Dave Chappelle return and then when Dave Chappelle predictably sounded like Dave Chappelle he was met with 305 think pieces, so I'm not going to be the one to wipe my ass with Rosie the Riveter's red bandana by questioning her right jab. However, if - and only if - someone were to tread into those all-too-dangerous waters then I might suggest that they start by claiming that women are slightly less capable of domestic abuse. 

Just take this video for instance. Athletes excluded obviously, but if there were to be a type of chick that could pack some power then it would Ronda Lousy that showed up straight up from the trailer park after a workout focused primarily on her beer muscles. Conversely, if there to be a type of guy that would succumb to a women's 12 punch combo then it would be a spring breaker in a straw hat that was just trying to find his second wind after spending all day drinking in the sun.

This "fight" was set up to favor the fairer sex...and the fairer sex couldn't even get her "competitor" to put down his drink. He made himself vulnerable and put himself off balance by bending down to pick up his sunglasses and Iron Michelle still couldn't land a knockout punch. Off that clip alone I think it's safe to say that Johnny Bahama could have roped that dope all day and still had a full beer by the end of it, so if there's any men out there looking to call the cops on their ball-and-chain make sure that ball-and-chain has a killer left or prepare to be met with a "riiiiiiight".