Uber Driver Taken Into Custody After Dropping Off A Woman At The Airport Then Attempting To Rob Her House
Yahoo- An Uber driver was arrested Tuesday in Denver for trying to rob the home of a customer he had just taken to the airport.
Gerald Montgomery, 51, is accused of second degree assault after trying to sneak in the back door of a home last Thursday.
Montgomery took a customer to Denver international airport and then went back and tried to get into her house, police spokesman Sonny Jackson told the The Denver Post.
The suspect fled from the scene when he realized someone else was in the house.
Ah, Gerald Montgomery. a man of many hats. Unfortunately for him, they all fit him terribly. Part time Uber driver. Part time burglar. Full time failure. I genuinely don't know if he is worse at being a driver or a thief. There are two jobs in the world that allow you to mask recon in the form of mindless small talk. Bartender and cab driver. There are things I have told cab drivers that I wouldn't tell my friends. Shit, I have engaged in gossip with Uber drivers about my friends. You flash me a wink, a smile, and drive 10 MPH over the speed limit and I would probably give you my social security number without giving it a second thought.
You mean to tell me while Gerald was driving Ms. Daisy to the airport he couldn't find out if she had a roommate? That's literally the only piece of information he needed to uncover. "How long you lived around here? Do you enjoy it? Didn't have anyone to drop you off?". Dammit Gerald, do I have to do everything for you? I despise nothing more than entering into pointless conversation with strangers and I just put your attempts to shame. You can't just decide to take up breaking and entering as a profession if you don't have the mind of a criminal. That last crime I committed was prank calling 911 from a payphone when I was 9 years old and it took me just 2 minutes to out-vandalize you. What did they even talk about during the ride? He probably sat there completely mute, staring blankly at the road, "thinking" about how he was going to ransack this woman's house. A tell that conspicuous would make Robert Durst cringe.
"Hey Mary, someone just tried to rob the house."
"Gee, I wonder if it was the eerily silent Uber driver that vaguely resembled the love child of Jerry Jones and the serial killer from 'The Jinx' that literally watched me walk out the front door 20 minutes ago?"
Another proud graduate of the 'Aaron Hernandez School Of Crime'. Even if this guy wasn't guilty he would be suspect number one. I don't know what Gerald's plans are for when he's free, but they probably shouldn't involve social interaction, subtlety, or any combination of the two.