Week 2: When It Rains, It Fucking Pours

I should have known. A demoralizing Rutgers loss followed by the harshest of hangovers. I literally got in the shower with my shirt on yesterday morning. That's how devastating this weekend had already been. All I wanted was a Saints win. Preferably a comfortable one, but who was I to get picky. I should have seen it coming. There are two teams the Saints inexplicably have difficulty with. The Browns and the Rams. I don't know why. It doesn't make sense. However, this time I thought things would be different. I thought our lord and savior would step up and make a play when a majority of the Saints roster had decidedly taken the afternoon off. I thought after botching the outcome of the Rutgers game, good God Almighty would step up and bring a little cheer to my Sunday. I thought a lot of things yesterday. Safe to say I was wrong.

I have defended Sean Payton pretty much throughout his entire career as the Saints head coach. Easily the best head coach in franchise history and an offensive wizard. Yesterday, as has been the case multiple times in the past, he was waving his wand a little recklessly and it cost his team dearly. I don't like to complain about play calling in football. I know these guys know far more than I do. However, when the play calling borders on insanity I have to, at the very least, say so. 


How many times is Sean Payton going to wax poetic about how important the run game is before he actually gives it a chance to work. I know the majority of people think Mark Ingram is a bust, but he has been absolutely on fire since the last few games of 2013. At one point in the 3rd quarter yesterday he had 8 carries for 77 yards. For those mathematically incompetent , thats roughly 9.5 yards per carry. Every time he touched the ball he was getting at least 4-5 yards. Why he decided to come out in the shotgun with an empty backfield time after time is beyond me. The passing game was non existent for a majority of the first half. Even when he did decide to run the ball, he would follow it up by going 4-5 receivers wide, leaving no illusion of the run. The absolute reckless waste of timeouts is also a cause for concern, seeing as it almost cost them a chance for points before the end of the half. I'm not dumb enough to be calling for his head, But maybe it's time to turn the play calling over to Pete Carmichael who orchestrated the Saints record breaking offense in 2011 when Sean Payton had to coach from upstairs while injured.

It also wouldn't be fair to only blame the coaching. The first half yesterday was as poor a showing from the Saints that I have seen execution wise. Not blocking, dropping passes, not tackling. It was downright hard to watch. Stunning first half performance after dropping a nail biter in the first game of the season. Jimmy Graham and Drew Brees gift wrapped 7 points for the Browns once the offense finally started moving the ball, and Patrick Robinson took a break from not covering anyone ever to take a mystifying offsides penalty on a missed field goal. That led to another 3. Those were just the highlights of a dreadful half of football.


While the team did pick up their play drastically at the end of the half and into the second half, you can't be spotting inferior teams 10 point leads because you decide to come out flat. The team did play lights out in the second half, but still managed to botch a 3rd and 5 which would have gave them the opportunity to add crucial points and run vital time off the clock late in the game. Also, with little time remaining, a defense that was supposed to rival last years top 5 finish, let Brian fucking Hoyer jam the ball down their throats like he was starring in a porno. Absolutely unacceptable. No pass rush, couldn't cover anyone for more than 2 seconds, just despicable. For all I can tell, the Saints vaunted free agent signing, Jairus Byrd, is being paid to play with his dick and make tackles 30 yards downfield. It's not fair to put it on one guy though. Especially one that missed most of the offseason recovering and is still getting used to the system. Plus, all the defensive players as a whole have been equally bad.

Whatever. Now the Saints are 0-2 with quite possibly the most talented roster they have ever had. A year where they were supposed to be legitimate Super Bowl contenders is now on the brink of deterioration just 2 games into the season. All is not lost, This is still a very talented team that can beat anyone when they decide to show up. But not leaving themselves much room for missteps down the line is genuinely concerning.

One time I needed a win. Just one fucking time boys. Thanks for nothing.

….And now Ingram is out a month with a hand injury….

Fuck. Anyone know a good therapist?