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Two Minutes, Well Worth It

Well, The Angels Clubhouse Sounds Like A Real Hollerin', Hootin' Good Time

7/2/2015

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Larry Brown Sports- So Mike Trout hung one of those Nerf mini-basketball hoops in the Angels’ clubhouse. One day, according to league sources, the hoop came down. Trout hung it back up. Down it went again.

Mike Scioscia, the sources said, did not like the idea of a foam ball being tossed around in his domain. He didn’t like loud music, either, so he turned the volume knob to a level he deemed appropriate. 



Good for Mike Scioscia. Everyone knows the key to a successful baseball season is having no distractions. There is no better way to better your record than by sitting silently in your locker room stall focusing intently on how average you are....everyday....for 162 games. Teams don't win with locker rooms that promote camaraderie. Teams win when their locker rooms are filled with a bunch of resentful assholes whose only common bond is that they hate their manager. Mini-basketball hoops? Music? When has a game of mini-HORSE ever improved someone's swing? When has Drake ever released a song that made a player more patient at the plate? Never, that's when. You want to have fun then save it for your off days when you can go out and do it behind you manager's back. No possible way a bunch of hostile players could get in any sort of trouble on their time off when when their workplace is a virtual mortuary for laughter. There's no room for children's games in the locker room of a bunch of young adults playing a kid's game as a profession.

I bet Mike Scioscis is a real blast to have as a father. Can't possibly succeed in life if you aren't serious/miserable 100% of every single day. You want to shoot away your future on a NERF hoop, by all means, but it's not happening under Scioscia's roof. Probably had all the privacy settings on PG for the television and the family computer. I'm like 90% certain his 25 year old son had an alcohol problem in college, and his 22 year old daughter has had her back blown out more than Tiger Woods when he's not going to make the cut. That's just what happens when you grow up around a frumpy, bitter old man whose only interaction with you is contentious at best. For what it's worth, I'm pretty sure I just nailed the Scioscia family dynamic.
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