Yesterday was a rough day for Gilbert. Okay, not exactly. He kind of brought it all on himself, so something tells me he just enjoys finally being in the news again. Still, he received a lot of backlash for his sexism and potential homophobia. Well, good news sports fans, Gilbert Arenas isn't homophobic, he LOVES lesbians! Why you ask? Because having sex with two girls at the same time is AWESOME! Why else?
I think I am finally starting to figure out Gilbert Arenas. After reading his comments yesterday I kind of assumed that his brain wasn't fully developed, but this all but guarantees it. Arenas may be a misogynistic adult, but it's only because he has the brain of a horny adolescent. Think about when you were in 7th grade and heard the word "lesbians"? That, like just about anything else, was enough to get your little dick hard. When you were in middle school you just thought that lesbians were women that liked dick so much that they wanted to share it with their friends. We weren't in the golden age of the homosexuality yet. The idea of a woman only liking women was a concept foreign to our underdeveloped, one track minds. I thought every lesbian was a super attractive straight girl that just happened to enjoy muff diving as a hobby. When I was 14, the visual I got from hearing the word "lesbians" was the two big breasted chicks on the Playboy channel making out and flicking each other's bean as they talked to a bunch of perverted male callers on 'Night Calls 411'. Never did it cross my mind that that word could potentially describe someone like Rosie O'Donnell. Gilbert Arenas, much like every guy that spent his formative years thinking about nothing but sex, assumes that lesbians are just bicurious girls constantly looking for the meat for their man-wich. That doesn't excuse his ignorance, but it very well might explain it. Seriously though, is Gilbert planning a comeback? Is he writing a book? Is this a "no publicity is bad publicity" kind of deal? His thoughts don't exactly surprise me, but the timing of them does. Why now Gilbert, WHY NOW!?!?
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