You Can't Help But Wonder The Steps That This CFL Fan Took Before Giving Up On Life...

@bustedcoverage pic.twitter.com/gPxLI7MFbz

— Matt Long (@mattlong_19) August 5, 2016

I don't mean for this to come off as an indictment of this old guy with an undying sense of curiosity regarding his scrotal aroma. It's very clear that he's easily done enough living to be able to justify his lack of concern with the opinions, expectations, and perceptions of others while he finishes off what undoubtedly has been a full existence. That said, there's a lot of steps you take before you feel comfortable going spread eagle and self regulating through the hole in the bottom of our short shorts. Like, there are so many things that are socially unacceptable about this display that you have to imagine that his frugality in the giving of fucks was a gradual process.

It's one thing to be the type of guy that starts wearing nut hugging jorts in public, but I don't think we are paying enough attention to the massive amount of societal indifference between what separates that type of guy and this guy. You just don't go from the dude who flashes too much thigh to the dude that shamelessly sniffs his nuts like no ones watching. There's levels to this shit, and if the point of the game is to not care what you look like playing it then I think that this guy just demolished the high score.

As if man spreading to such an extreme extent that your making skin-on-skin contact with the guy you came with wasn't enough, this old bastard touched his genitals THROUGH THE BOTTOM OF HIS LEG HOLE while doing so. The closest I have come to that volume of  unorthodox groping in public was when I grabbed my first boob through the top of the shirt in a movie theatre, and at least I had naivety to blame. Gramps decision to go under and up is so mind blowing that it almost makes the fact that he did it so he could take a quick inhale of ball sweat on a hot summer night forgettable. I don't know if this guy is a legend, a pariah, or some harmless combination of both, but we almost have to respect how many awkward stares he's fought through to reach this point of his humanhood. 

h/t BustedCoverage