Gabby Douglas (The "UnAmerican" Gymnast That Didn't Look Excited Enough) Is Going To Help Judge 'Miss America'

YardBarker- Gabby Douglas is used to judges determining her fate in competitions, and now the 20-year-old gymnast will get an opportunity to see what it feels like to be on the other side.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Douglas has joined the panel of judges for the upcoming 2017 Miss America pageant, which will take place on Sept. 11. The three-time gold medalist’s fellow judges will include singer-actress Laura Marano from the Disney Channel, Sara Foster of VH1’s “Barely Famous,” singer-songwriter Cole Swindell and former Miss America Sharlene Wells Hawkes among others who will be named later.

“Miss America has been such an amazing event for so many years and I am excited to have the opportunity to judge the competition this year,” Douglas said. “The contestants are a great example of strong women across America and I especially look forward to hearing the platforms that each of them will represent.”



How do you make it up to a woman whose facial expressions were excessively critiqued online despite the fact that she successfully represented the home country of those critiquing those facial expressions? Give her a platform where her "resting bitch face" is not only accepted, but welcomed! Gabby Douglas shouldn't be required to smile or put a hand over her heart every time there is a camera on her. Fuck every idiot trying to shame her into "instinctively" reacting however they deem appropriate. That's not what America is about. America is about freedom and that means Gabby Douglas should feel free to look unenthused by anything and everything she pleases.

What better place to do so than the judge's table at a 'Miss America' pageant? It's the ultimate redemption! Every overly critical, outspoken asshole had their chance to disparage her for not forcing a grin during competition, and now it's her turn to disparage others whose success in their competition is dependent on their ability to force a grin. Finally her impulsive nostril uptick and condescending glares will be productive! Hopefully the people that mercilessly belittled her perceived Patriotism will watch 'Miss America' and see how superficial and absentminded it is to grade the entirety of someone's emotions by a momentary look on their face. That likely won't happen because those that did are too simple to make that connection, but at least Gabby Douglas should feel a sense of vengeance by testing the tear ducts of a bunch of uppity suburban girls in dresses with a stare that could pierce their soul. If there's anything that'll be sure to coerce a smile out of her it's revenge!