Joel Embiid Might Have Been Right About That Whole Chandler Parsons Virginity Thing

Joel Embiid asking Chandler Parsons on instagram if he's a virgin... pic.twitter.com/KL6qYMweEF

— treevo (@7reevo) December 13, 2016

Chandler Parsons is one of the biggest finesse savages I've ever seen play in the NBA □ pic.twitter.com/fTkMQeHmZW

— (14-12) (9-4) (@New_Tape_City) December 16, 2016

I have no choice but to believe that one of two things is happening here. Either Chandler Parsons is doing a bad job of jokingly playing into the whole virgin label that was undeservedly slapped upon him by Joel Embiid, or Joel Embiid knows a lot more about Chandler Parsons love life than he probably should. Asking a social media model to show you her tits on a live feed with hundreds of other people is a move reserved for those that claim ownership of the most inexperienced of dicks. That's just a fact. So if an NBA player whose contract is worth so much that most Instagram models couldn't even correctly calculate the number of zeros completely ignores the existence of DM's and goes the "horny commenter" route then he's either pretending he has no game or he's simply never scored. I don't know how someone that played basketball for four years at the University of Florida could possibly have an unchristened penis, but I also don't know why he would think that this is all that funny. I would never hate on a man for shooting his shot with someone who looks like Felicia Sanders, but the selection could use some work because something tells me this one doesn't stand a very good chance of coming up wet. In fact, I would argue that making your elementary, perverted demands public has about the same rate of success as Chandler Parsons knees.