Well, it looks like I owe some self loathing, lot dwelling dickhead an apology. In fairness, how was I supposed to know that Joe Mixon responded to a parking ticket by trying to re-park his vehicle up the ass of some self important rent-a-cop?
In retrospect, I suppose I shouldn't have given the running back who sat out the previous season after hitting a women the benefit of the doubt when it came to managing his anger even semi-appropriately. That's on me for assuming that his confrontation with a parking attendant was something a little less egregious than a half-hearted attempt at vehicular homicide. I thought he was just a normal, overly emotional college kid that ripped up the ticket and called the person trying to sneak away after placing it on his windshield a "shithead" or something to that effect. Didn't think his first instinct was going to be to get behind the wheel, rev the engine, and burnout in the general direction a human fucking being. Guess I have to start being more wary of the antics of those that have been accused of domestic abuse. I'll gladly wear that as a necessary improvement that I need to make as a person...as long as the parking attendant admits that anything short of trying to run them over is a fair and adequate response to a bullshit citation.