I don't want to burst Barry Bonds bubble here, but this isn't racist. It might be wrong, stupid, ignorant, offensive, or some combination of all of those, but it's not racist. The fact of the matter is that white people rapping along with inappropriate lyrics isn't full blown racist until they do so in front of a black person. In fact, I am pretty sure the entire reason the word 'appropriation' exists is so that white people have a way to describe their incessant need to accurately do karaoke without being put in the same class as actual bigots. In a perfect world hip hop songs that are so reliant upon the use of the word "nigga" wouldn't be so catchy, and caucasians everywhere wouldn't have to mind their tongue so often. Unfortunately that's not the case, but the fact that we do watch our mouths is predicated - almost solely - on the presence of black people. That's just the God's honest truth. Only reason I suppressed my vocals while pulling into my high school parking lot was because I didn't want to unintentionally offend someone and get punched in the face. That was a learned behavior. You know why a bunch of kids at Barry Bonds daughter's school aren't censoring themselves? Because he sent them to a fucking Los Angeles private school that's 98% white. Seeing a black person wandering the halls at Brentwood is like seeing a white girl in a Tyler Perry movie. Without this idiotic footage these presumably drunk, likely entitled white kids stood the same chance of being heard by an African American as I do when I'm singing along with Dr. Dre while driving through a mid-winter snowstorm. Again, white people should be more aware no matter what the context, but when the context is rap music that happens to feature the 'N' word then I'm a little hesitant to label some kids with the 'R' word. Especially when they are a bunch of 10th graders that have never known anything other than country clubs and have never had anyone around them that would deter such melodic, tasteless language.
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BustedCoverage- The Frisco RoughRiders, the Double-A affiliate of the Texas Rangers, are winding up for a thirst-quenching haymaker with the introduction of “Rougie’s Red PUNCH.” The new alcoholic energy drink, named in recognition of former RoughRider Rougned Odor’s iconic punch in Sunday’s Rangers game, will be available for a limited time at Dr Pepper Ballpark’s Bull Moose Saloon beginning this upcoming weekend when the RoughRiders host the San Antonio Missions beginning Friday, May 20.
The beverage is the perfect blend of ingredients made as an homage to Odor, who played for the Riders in parts of 2013 and 2014. It contains fruit punch (in honor of his prodigious right hook), an energy drink (perfect for those looking to embody Odor’s ferocious and frenetic style of play), and a secret ingredient from Odor’s native Venezuela (Rougie’s Red PUNCH will be available to fans 21-and-older only!). There it is, the Minor League difference. Couple million less advertising dollars at stake, and a couple million more promotional ideas become available. A guy has to serve an 8 game suspension for one punch in the Majors, and the likeness of that punch is slapped on the side of a cup filled with house liquor and bargain basement energy supplements in the Minors. A book full of unwritten rules in the Majors while the only unwritten rule in the Minors is to do anything possible for even the smallest amount of additional attendance. No better way to put asses in the seats then to offer some gimmicky drink special that honors a play that caters directly to the Minor League crowd. This was the best thing to happen to the Frisco RoughRiders in years. They should just change their name to the Frisco Rougned's and their logo to "the punch" for the remainder of the season. Guaranteed ticket sales. Have to milk the most exciting play in a complete seperate baseball league for all it's worth, and - considering a seat along the third baseline costs $6.50 - it's undoubtedly worth it's weight in beer money. Especially if they are smart about it and start marketing every weekend long series as a "punchdrunk" event. Sorry Jose. Glad you'll always have that bat flip, because the outline of your face is going to be forever memorialized in Minor League baseball lore as synonymous with binge drinking over-caffeinated adult beverages.
I know Lakers fans are busy furiously beating their dick at the mere thought of Ben Simmons or Brandon Ingram in the purple and gold, and this is the type of thing I would LOVE to hear if I were them. Let's face it, Luke Walton is a relative unknown as a Head Coach. Yeah, he helped orchestrate a historically long winning streak in Golden State but a large majority of that credit has been given to the system of Steve Kerr and the unbridled success of Steph Curry. There are certainly more than a few people that thought of Luke Walton as nothing more than a pretty face standing behind the bench and smiling his way to success. That's why I would find it reassuring, if I were a Lakers fan, that people within the Warriors organization respect Luke Walton enough to prank him to the brink of suicide. Make no mistake, taking the Lakers job and then almost immediately losing your first round pick after it fell out of the top three would be catastrophic. The fact that Raymond Riddler (hell of a name for a PR guy) wanted to see Luke Walton's heart sink to the deepest of depths before abruptly rising from the ashes like a phoenix is a testament to how well liked he is within that franchise. You only destroy someone's dreams that badly if you consider them a dear friend. Intentionally getting someone's hopes down so that any outcome that isn't a complete tragedy seems even better by comparison is how you let someone know that you appreciate them. I don't know if Luke Walton is a good coach or not, but I do know that one employee's desire to see him experience the sharpest of mood swings means that a potential back-to-back championship winning team views him as such. P.S. If Raymond Riddler had lied and told him that they got the first overall pick when they didn't then I would do anything and everything in my power to tear up that contract if I were the Lakers. Cleveland Photshopped A Cavaliers Jersey Onto Drake, And Sadly It Was Very, Very Believable5/18/2016 You see, this right here is the problem with having Drake as your celebrity ambassador. I respect that he is such a devout Raptors fan, but he's also infamous for being a bandwagon jumping son-of-a-bitch. This picture isn't real but it doesn't even have to be, because at a quick glance there's no reason to think it's not real. I'm actually surprised that they couldn't find an actual picture of Drake in a Cavaliers jersey because there is little to no doubt that there is at least one hanging up in his closet. If you saw Jack Nicholson in a Clippers shirt your eyes wouldn't even comprehend what you were seeing, yet Drake gets plastered on the JumboTron in a LeBron jersey, and - despite being an obvious photoshop - it just doesn't feel all that out of place. This might not seem like a big deal, but do you think that a franchise would ever have the gall to put Spike Lee in Celtic green? I think we all know the answer to that. The fact of the matter is that people will always consider the status of Drake's loyalty as "questionable" no matter how many times he stands up and claps obnoxiously courtside. His fanhood will always be thought of as fickle, and he's given us no reason to think that shouldn't be the case... There Can't Possibly Be Multiple Television Personalities That Don't Know Who Cam Newton Is5/18/2016
Is having the most basic of sports knowledge something that it frowned upon by news anchors? Something tells me that these three made a pact before the show started not to answer any questions regarding sports because they didn't want to be affiliated - in any way - with the "dumb jocks" that concern themselves with professional athletics. That's really the only explanation I can think of. You can convince me that they think they are above knowing who Cam Newton is, but you can't convince me that they don't actually know who Cam Newton is. A group of people - featuring a black guy - who work in television and can't identify one of the most popular public figures of the past year by his job title? Cam Newton's success caused more widespread public debate than the national debt. He was indirectly responsible for more useless round table discussion than the Presidential election. He was a racially, socially, and somewhat politically divisive personality, but somehow that wasn't enough for him to retain space in the huge brains of Anderson Cooper, Lara Logan, and Michael Steele? Get the FUCK out of here. I call bullshit. I don't "do" politics, but I know Barack Obama is the first black President. I don't "do" religion, but I know all forms of sex that don't result in a fetus leave you hell bound. I don't "do" geography, but I can point out Texas on a map. You don't have to "do" sports to correlate the name Cam Newton with "Carolina Panthers quarterback". He had a goddamn camera in his face for the entirety of the Super Bowl and these stooges didn't so much as commit his name to memory? Yeah, that's believable. Don't play dumb with me Lara. You get paid to be smart and attractive, and this ignorance looks absolutely dreadful on you.
At this point it's not even Mike Milbury's fault. I suppose we could blame him for sitting in front of the nation and urging players to put the careers - as well as long term health - of their peers at risk, but we can't blame for still being given the platform to do so. Most hockey fans, myself included, want the guy to be off the air as soon as possible and I'll be damned if he's not doing everything in his power to make that a reality. One man can only do so much to lose his job. Doesn't matter how many bad goals he gives up, it's not a starting goaltender's job to pull himself. Mike Milbury isn't in charge of doing the firing, but being a strong advocate of more broken bones and lost brain cells is just about as close as he can get to officially asking for his walking papers. When you're in a battle of ineptitude with someone that compared the work ethic of Sidney Crosby and Jonathan Drouin - just moments before Sidney Crosby scored in overtime - there's not too much else you can say to continue to look like far and away the least competent person at your company. He did just that by suggesting that athletes should actively attempt to cause more head injuries. By encouraging an increase in concussions he picked his hill to die on, but he still needs someone else to pull the trigger. He's not going to break his contract by resigning. He might be dumb, but he's not stupid. That incredibly frowned upon opinion wasn't just something that slipped off the tip of his tongue. Just because it wasn't remotely intelligent doesn't mean it wasn't well thought out. I personally think we owe Mike Milbury a thank you. I refuse to believe that someone who gets paid to talk on television is as inept as the words that came out of his mouth last night, and therefore I have no choice but to think he is trying to get canned on behalf of an audience that universally hates his guts. P.S. When I was a kid my youth hockey coach told me "don't fight someone unless you are prepared to kill them". Probably not the greatest advice in the world but his job was to scare discipline into me, not pander to a national television audience. I Honestly Can't Believe The Mayor Of Toronto Wrote A Letter Addressing An Online Sports Poll5/17/2016 Here's the problem, this is exactly how the Mayor of Toronto should feel. He should feel slighted by an online poll that quite clearly disparaged his entire jurisdiction. He should take pride in the fact that the Raptors advanced when everyone and their mother had picked the Heat before the series had even started. He should get a kick out of Dwyane Wade sitting at home - removing his 15th pair of kneepads that somehow hold whatever cartilage is left in his knees together - after he clearly showed a lack of respect for his country. He just shouldn't be taking time out of his day to write about it. You want to people to treat you like North America's 4th largest city? Start acting like it. Stop responding to every little joke made at your expense. That's something "other" would do. If Toronto is that special then there simply has to be something more important to do than acknowledging a completely useless ballot that no one with a brain, job, or hobby is even taking part in. Even if there isn't something more important to do on a random Tuesday afternoon just pretend there is. Maybe have Norm Kelly throw a couple corny Dad jokes CBS' way on Twitter. Don't bust out the official letter head to defend yourself against something as insignificant as the opinion of those engaging in internet surveys. Toronto is never going to be a big time NBA city is they keep showing their insecurities at every turn. Like I said, I would feel exactly the same way if I were John Tory. However, I would just internalize it and keep it in the memory bank in case the unthinkable happens. That's when you start writing defensive PSA's, not before the Cavaliers measure you up and potentially do turn you into the "other" team in the Eastern Conference Finals. Update: He beat me to the punch...
SportsNaut- Brees planned to spend a period of time with 10 year-old Hunter Glass from Shreveport. Glass has cerebral palsy, and it has always been his dream to meet Brees, per KSLA.com.
Brees told the young boy that he was there to meet him, which brought tears of joy to Glass. Glass received an autograph and some one-on-one time with his football icon. According to KSLA, it was “The Pay It Forward Networking” organization that made the connection between Glass and Brees a reality. Don't worry Hunter. If Drew came up and tapped me on the shoulder I would probably be a little overwhelmed too. You know, until he told me to move so he could continue to visit more sick and/or unfortunate children. Still, while he walked past to continue offering up more charitable donations and using his popularity for nothing but good he would probably leave a trail of my joyous tears in his wake as well. You'e not the only one that wouldn't be able to handle your emotions around someone as impressive as the greatest Saint in franchise history. Anyway, this is just yet another reason why Drew Brees is the best possible ambassador for the city of New Orleans and it's football team. Never not enough time in the day to spend a couple minutes not only engaging, but getting to know a fan who wasn't dealt the most formidable of hands. Doesn't matter if he's the center of attention in a jam packed bar. It appears that Drew Brees just has that inherent ability to make anyone and everyone feel special, and my man Hunter that just had a dream come true is no different. P.S. The correct answer to the headline is during contract negotiations, and only during contract negotiations. The Raptors Owe CBS A 'Thank You' For Creating A Championship Poll That Doesn't Have Them Listed5/17/2016 I'm not going to lie. As the picture so eloquently illustrates above, being left off a championship poll the first time your team has ever made it to the conference finals is quite the kick in the dick to the Toronto Raptors and their fans. Straight up disrespect from CBS which is ironic considering they are basically the 'Other' when it comes to basic cable television networks. However, if Raptors fans are truly this concerned about a poll then they should worry less about how tthey are referenced in it and more about the numbers they put up. If there is anything I know about anonymous public surveys it's that people love to be contrarian, and the contrarian answer just so happens to be synonymous with Toronto's beloved basketball team. Sure, a corporation refusing to acknowledge you by name is as insulting as it gets, but what better way to stick it to them then by racking up votes as the oft-forgotten option. If that online ballot said 'Raptors' it would top out at 5% and every last one of those 5% would be from Canada. Go by 'Other' and you might just be in the mix with some national support from people that intentionally pick the antagonist answer just to be difficult. Sometimes it pays off to be the proverbial write-in candidate. Might not work here, but if John Scott can be the MVP of the NHL All Star Game then ANYTHING IS POSSIBOOOOOO!!!! Metro- It’s the ultimate in extreme sex – parties where one person secretly has HIV, and everyone has unprotected sex without knowing who it is.Doctors in Barcelona have claimed that ‘sex roulette’ parties taking place, usually among gay men – and it echoes previous reports of such parties among wealthy people in Serbia.
The ‘thrill’ comes from knowing you might be infected, people who claim to have attended such parties say. Dr Josep Mallolas of Hospital Clinic Barcelona says that the parties are a sign that people have ‘lost respect’ for HIV, in a report in el Periodico. Mallolas says, ‘There is everything: sex roulette parties, or sex parties you can only attend if you already have HIV.’ You ever been invited to a get together that you knew you weren't going to be welcomed to with open arms. Maybe you got a pity invite to a housewarming party from an old friend that you had a falling out with. Maybe it's an ex's wedding that she felt guilty not inviting you to. Whatever the case may be, you appreciate the gesture but you know that everyone would be better off if you respectfully declined. Well, the guy walking around the "sex roulette party" as the sole person with HIV is the most exaggerated example of someone that didn't realize that his invite was sent out with the hopes that he wouldn't show up. Leave it to the person with the sexually transmittable virus to completely lack social etiquette. I know what you are thinking, "how can a sex roulette party truly be a sex roulette party without a patient zero?". Long story short, it can't. If Magic Johnson can take a hint then the threat of passing around a potentially deadly disease isn't legitimate. That said, it's not that people need the threat of HIV to be real to enjoy the thrill of potentially getting it. They just need to think the threat of HIV is real to enjoy the thrill of potentially getting it. It's equates to a woman that likes to be choked during sex. She just wants to feel like she's vulnerable to strangulation without really having to worry about whether she's breathed her last breathe. If the person that introduces the sickness to the party doesn't show up then the theme of the party isn't compromised, because no one knows who that person is anyway. People are just out there having relatively "clean" anal sex while still experiencing the weirdest of arousals that they achieve from sodomizing possibly tainted turd cutters. As long as the sickly person on the guest list happens to be selfless and self aware then it's the best of both worlds...or something like that. P.S. I guess it's fair to say that HIV is basically the common cold if people are knowingly and anxiously putting themselves at risk just to enter a couple of unknown assholes.
Words can't even describe how much of a dickhead you would have to be to take offense to Steven Adams comparing two of the NBA's quickest, shiftiest guards to monkeys. Obviously it's best to steer clear of primate references when a large majority of your peers are black. That goes without saying. However, if you can't tell the difference between a racially charged insult and a respect-driven compliment then maybe basketball isn't the sport for you. Probably best for those that don't understand context clues to stick to all-white sports where they can't treat every ape analogy as a slight to someone's skin color and general appearance. Just a thought. Plus, Steven Adams gets a pass. Dude is from New Zealand. Every athlete from an island in the South Pacific is allowed to shed light on whatever animalistic observation they want without criticism. Especially an athlete that is one of eighteen children whose AVERAGE height is 6'9. He can call out all the chimp similarities he wants because he basically comes from a family of real life Big Foots. This probably isn't even relatively close to true, but New Zealand strikes me as one of those places where people just have wild animals roaming around their property. The Adams probably interacted with more orangutans then they did with people outside of their immediate family. I bet Steven Adams has the upmost respect for simians. That's why correlating the abilities of the NBA's first unanimous MVP with one is actually praise of the highest order - no matter what race Steph Curry happens to be. World's most senseless, and unnecessary apology...
Welcome to the new age! What? You thought we were going to wait until a female actually played professional baseball before we made a television series based on a true story that presumably takes place sometime in the future? Do you know how long it takes to produce a television show? Fox was just getting out ahead of the curve with the the influx of women bound to make their Major League debuts in the next couple of seasons. I suppose that's a poor choice of words since this broad only throws a gimmicky screwball, but the fact of the matter is that women - much like the African Americans before them - are all but certain to overcome the systemic hurdles put in place to consciously keep them out of pro sports. It would be a damn shame if we had to wait until well after they did before we got to watch a television show about it. Hell, it took Jackie Robinson 67 years after breaking the color barrier before he got a movie. I don't want the first female starting pitcher to be dead by the time she gets to watch a biographical series that is loosely based on her hypothetical life. You can ignore the inevitable if you want, but it won't be long before the fairer sex is forcing men to hand over sole possession of another type of diamond and Fox will be damned if they aren't caught up with the times when they do. In all seriousness, this show doesn't look half bad. I might even watch it once it finally airs. I don't actually care that the plot is incredibly unrealistic. A woman succeeding in Major League Baseball purely through the use of guile is simply not possible given the superior athleticism of male dominated sports, but that's okay because I still enjoy watching a movie about a 12 year old breaking his arm and floater pitching his way to a pennant. I, by no means, need my programming to be rooted in reality. That said, I also don't want my programming promoting itself as if it's some sort of self fulfilling prophecy, because no amount of fictional women in professional baseball is going to make it easier for women to actually play professional baseball. With One Clutch Overtime Goal Sidney Crosby Proved Why The NHL Desperately Needs New Analysts5/17/2016 Here is a fact. Sidney Crosby is perennially one of the hardest working players in hockey, but exiting the third period last night he was staring a nine game scoreless drought directly in the face. That's why made this clutch save on him all the more demoralizing...
Here is another fact. The guy that scored this game tying goal - Jonathan Druin - is in the midst of an excellent playoff run, but was oft-criticized prior to his call-up of being a me first player that didn't have the best interests of the team in mind...
Considering the inherent truth behind those two statements, this comment from Jeremy Roenick might just be the stupidest thing ever uttered while discussing any aspect of any sport on a widely disseminated platform... If you needed any further proof of that then Sidney Crosby provided it no more than one minute into an overtime period that was crucial to keeping his team in the series...
Does anyone know if the 'Inside The NBA' crew has time to pull double duty and discuss some hockey in between periods? Actually fuck it, I don't even need them to discuss hockey. They can just sit around and talk about the eating habits of the women of Pittsburgh. It can't be any less relevant than Jeremy Roenick spewing out non-sensical verbal diarrhea just to hear himself talk. I don't even feel comfortable calling his comparison of Crosby and Drouin a "hot take", because that would be disrespectful to heat. At best that was nothing more than lukewarm stupidity. If Skip Bayless knew what a hockey puck was even he would say that Roenick was trying too hard to be controversial. The guy that is paid to discuss, in detail, the most pressure packed moments of the season just said something that would make the drunken buffoon sitting behind you at his first hockey game ever stop yelling "SHOOT!" and check his program. The most casual of fans heard this and immediately started googling stats because they thought that their fundamental knowledge of the NHL was outdated. The best two way player in the sport needs to take notes from a guy that needed a literal handful of injuries to take place before his organization felt comfortable inserting him into the lineup. A player whose work ethic has never been questioned needs to use the rookie that's just a few months removed from demanding a trade out of spite as his role model. How rich. Everyone knows that you can't say you're trying if you're not scoring. That's just next level hockey analysis right there. It's about time Crosby dedicated 30 seconds of his precious time to giving a little effort. Wouldn't you know it, that's all it took to get his team back into the series.
You know how some people think the Cavaliers will have a hard time once they inevitably get to the finals because they won't be used to an increased level of competition? I feel like the referees are experiencing that same phenomenon right now. It's like they got so comfortable calling terrible basketball games that they have been haunted by stupid mistakes in nearly every single one that has come down to the wire. It's been so bad - in fact - that egregious, potential game deciding missed calls are all but expected at this point. Whether it be Dion Waiters shoving Manu Ginobili from out of bounds, Kawhi Leonard's not being whistled for an intentional foul that led to a game deciding 3-point play, or Russell Westbrook taking a casual stroll around Oakland with the ball nestled closely into his bosom. The officials have made negligence a habit and in doing so they have forced me to do something I haven't even been able to accomplish in my love life. That is overlook - and even accept -their flaws. A ref looking on as Russell Westbrook bursted through the offensive line and carried the ball for a first down should piss me off, but a missed travel is really the least we should have expected in crunch time last night. They have been so routinely oblivious that I have stopped looking at potential fouls and turnovers through the scope of the integrity of the game, and started judging them by whether or not they benefited the team that I thought was deserving of the win. Ironically enough, almost all of these head scratching blunders have benefited the Thunder, but they've benefited the Thunder in games in which they outplayed their opponent. That's a super passive way to look at things when the stakes are at their highest, but with the continued buffoonery of those in charge of the most crucial of decisions it's really the only way at this point. Ahh, I am going to miss having a personable, relatable President that can easily adapt to his surroundings. Now obviously he was coached up on what to make sure he "knew" about Rutgers University. I highly doubt he's drunkenly devoured a fat sandwich before, and something tells me the secret service didn't get away with sneaking him into Olde Queens for a pre-speech cocktail. That said, it was pretty damn impressive hearing him go on and on about Rutgers traditions without sounding like they were completely foreign to them. Maybe it's because I have gotten used to listening to his potential successors fail to go more than 5 minutes on the campaign trail without a "wait...what?!?" moment, but every single time Barack Obama speaks nowadays he sounds more and more like a rational human being. A little bit of sports knowledge. A little bit of history. Some self deprecating humor about his wife. I feel like everyone, including the President of the United States, should have had a beer in their hand for that opening monologue, because there was something inherently inclusive and reminiscent about. Barack Obama may not know the State University of New Jersey from that football-less disgrace for a college in South Orange, but he sounded like he did in delivering a commencement speech that - for once - didn't have people on the verge of yawns. He gave a proper send off to the class of 2016, and reminded us all that by the time 2017 rolls around this whole country is fucked. Whole speech below...
YardBarker- PGA Tour golfer Steve Wheatcroft was not near the top of the leader board after three rounds at The Players Championship, so he decided to have a little fun during the event’s final round on Sunday.
Wheatcroft shot 68, 74, and 79 in the first three rounds and found himself in 70th place after Saturday’s action. It was obvious there wasn’t much for him to play for on the final day, so he decided to switch up caddies. With the tournament being held not far from Jacksonville, Wheatcroft called on someone familiar to fans of the Jaguars. Wheatcroft shot 73 on the final 18 holes, which was his best showing since the first round. Scobee may or may not have had anything to do with it, but kudos to Wheatcroft for thinking outside of the box and having a little fun on the final day after a disappointing first three rounds. Now Josh, don't you go about worrying yourself with the best interests of the New Orleans Saints. I think your teammates - that you have yet to drive insane by repeatedly missing chip shot field goals - will understand that you have found your true calling. I know you want to continue place kicking, but sometimes in life it's not about what you want to do. Sometimes it's about what you were meant to do. I don't know if you born to be a caddy, but you're far better at providing a dependable club than you are at providing a dependable leg. New Orleans will miss you, but we can make due with Kai Forbath. The same can't be said for your buddy Steve Wheatcroft who is destined to live a life full of missed cuts if he keeps letting that bum Mike weigh him down the leaderboard with unsatisfactory advice. One round and already a 6 stroke improvement? By God, you're a natural! Why waste your time being the world's most disrespected type of athlete when you can be the world's most disrespected type of athletic supervisor? I'm not exactly a golf aficionado, but with the potential you have shown on the fairways there appears to be a wealth of secondary accomplishments in your future. I can't - no - I won't stand idly by while the team I root for employs someone that is sacrificing a host of grateful pats on the back just for the loudest of boos and the most derogatory of jeers. Trust me Josh, this is about what's best for you...and what's best for the mental health of Saints fans, but mostly best for you. Kyrie Irving's Ex-Girlfriend Kehlani Got Peppered With "KYRIE!" Chants During A Live Performance5/16/2016
You see, the thing they never tell you about jersey chasing is that ironically enough it's going to come back around and catch up with you. It's all good when people start recognizing you based solely off of the infinitely more famous dick you happen to be sucking. Not so good when you spurn that dick - in preposterously public fashion - for a lesser known dick and now even the people that pay to see your shows (more likely the shows that you just happen to be opening for) just know you as a cheating whore with a very forgettable catalogue. Must be pretty sobering to be on stage in the pouring rain performing to a bunch of people - that barely cared when your "suicide" attempt was unsuccessful - while they berate you with chants of your ex-boyfriend's name. I bet if Kehlani knew this is how things were going to play out when she started fucking her way to fame then she would have mixed a bartender or two into her dating resume. Talented or not, this poor girl is forever going to known as a promiscuous little vixen that let her infidelity with a pro basketball player get broadcasted via the Instagram account of a bum ass singer named 'Party Next Door'. Might as well just change her name now. I probably already forget what she looks like up close but if I hear someone say "Kehlani" I am going to repeatedly scream "Kyrie" too. Never forget... Props To Kyle Lowry For This Subtle Attempt To Get To LeBron James The Only Way He Can - Mentally5/16/2016
I have never even come remotely close to firing a gun so I can't tell describe the upcoming reference in detail, but do you know the type of bullets that fragment into pieces post-impact doing the most damage well after piercing the skin? This subtle, yet calculated comment from Kyle Lowry is the verbal equivalent of that bullet, and the target was the brain of LeBron James. There's little to no doubt in my mind that LeBron watched that clip on repeat dissecting every word. "Probably"? "One of"? "Besides Steph"? All keywords that sparked at least a couple hours worth of mental anguish, and all keywords that were carefully used by an opponent that knew exactly what he was doing. Remember just last week when LeBron was showing his insecurities by giving back handed compliments to Steph Curry and Steve Kerr after they won their individual awards? Well he's not the only one that can pseudo-insult someone through the use of half-hearted praise, but the difference here is that Kyle Lowry's attempt actually stands a remote chance of having the desired effect. Chances are the Raptors bow out in 4 games. Maybe Kyle Lowry gives a repeat performance from Game 7 and they last 5 games. Whatever the case may be, their odds of winning aren't exactly great. Kyle Lowry knows that, and - more importantly - he knows that the only way they do win is if LeBron implodes and starts worrying more about himself than the team. If there is anything we have learned from this season it's that LeBron becomes very insecure at the mere thought of Steph Curry's success. He's becomes a vulnerable teenager in a mutant's body at the mention of him as anything less than the best player in the league. Incepting him with the idea that his Cavaliers are inferior to the Golden State Warriors because of each team's respective leaders probably won't change the outcome against the Raptors, but desperate times call for desperate measures. LBS- Nothing is more important to Floyd Mayweather Jr. than his image, so we really shouldn’t be surprised to hear how much he spends on haircuts. Still, we can’t help but shake our head at it.
TMZ recently spoke with Jackie Starr, who is Mayweather’s stylist and has been cutting his hair since 2009. It sounds like a pretty good gig for her, as Floyd pays $1,000 per haircut and hits her up multiple times a week. “I cut his hair two times a week, three times is pushing it, but then it also depends on the occasion,” Starr said. “If he’s in training I will cut him Monday, Wednesday and Friday.” And this, my friends, is why rich people are never at a loss for company. Doesn't matter if Floyd Mayweather is an insufferable douchebag, because he's an insufferable douchebag that doesn't mind tossing his money around - even if he's just doing so to draw attention to himself. You think Jackie Starr gives a shit if all the chair-time chatter is about her customer's net worth when she's getting paid 2-3 thousand dollars a week for what amounts to a 45 minutes of work? I don't know if she has another job, but I doubt she needs one considering she's making AT LEAST six figures under the table to give a bi-weekly shapeup that's nearly impossible to fuck up. The hardest part of her job isn't even making sure she gives a smooth shave or lining her client's beard up evenly on both sides, it's biting her tongue when he's blabbering on and on about his own self importance. That's still not worth what she's making to do it, but it's worth far more than the $20 that the average considerate asshole pays to have his 'Mr. Clean' looking lemony fresh. People might kill Floyd for this, but if I was worth 600 million dollars I would drop 100K a year on a full time barber without even thinking twice. I shave my head every Friday just in cause I feel like getting off the couch and seeing other humans. For someone like Floyd Mayweather - that is sure to run into a camera every time he leaves the house - massively overpaying to look good when he inevitably does is definitely a worthwhile investment. I'm not going to sit here and tell you that one little beard tugging match has all but decided the outcome of the Western Conference Final. I will say that it did more than test the durability of a man's grungy, ungroomed face sweater. This NHL equivalent of a girl fight reminded us that Joe Thornton is still the same guy that has made a habit out of perennially choking in the playoffs. It reminded us that no matter how much of his face he covers with an unkempt mane, it's still the face that has become synonymous with postseason failure. I don't think Joe Thornton has warranted all the criticism he's faced on a year-to-year basis, nor do I think he's as soft of a player as everyone else accuses him of being. That being said, the fact that David Backes didn't hesitate to reinact a scene from every bad Christmas movie ever made shows that the St Louis Blues still view him as susceptible to intimidation. He might technically be a beard guy, but he doesn't get the respect of a beard guy. He gets the respect of a guy that would rather show up 10 minutes late to the office than show up with a 5 o'clock shadow. He may have the look of a hardened veteran, but he's got the reputation of a wide-eyed, baby-faced amateur that's too easily overwhelmed by the moment. Think of all the people in your life that have an exorbitant amount of facial hair. How many of those guys have you seen get that hair tugged in a mocking, threatening fashion? I'm willing to bet that answer is zero. Not because all beard guys are tough as nails, but because they give off the vibe that they aren't to be fucked with. Regardless of how much different Joe Thornton looks from year's past, he still hasn't done enough to convince teams they can't get the better of him when the game is on the line - beard or not. |
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