Is this chick running around the kitchen crying and slamming milk cringeworthy? Absolutely. However, there is no way I can, in good conscience, hate on her. Anyone that considers themselves a die hard sports fan has had a moment like this. A moment where you act like an absolute toddler. The beauty of sports is it brings out our child like instincts. Sometimes maturity goes out the window when you need to blow off some steam. I've punched a few walls, thrown a few remotes, smashed a few beers. Who hasn't?
This right here is the reason you don't watch games with fans of rival teams. My roommate is a Rangers fan. I love the kid to death. I want to throw a brick directly through his skull every time he walks into the room and the Devils are losing. I'm sure he feels the same when the Rangers are losing. The last thing you need is a person close to you poking fun and stating the blatantly obvious. I can only imagine what I would do if I was being videotaped during my tantrums. That's how fights start. This girl would have been completely justified to channel her inner Hope Solo. No way that dude has two white eyes today if he were singing their fight song to a male.
I'm pretty sure every single Ole Miss fan had some form of this reaction. Did you see the end of the game? A delay of game penalty on a game winning field goal attempt? Bo fucking Wallace launching a misguided missile into double coverage when all he need was 5-7 yards to get back into FG range? I would have been distraught too. I would have went over my minutes calling suicide hotlines. Regionally, Ole Miss has been the little brother to LSU for years. This would have been their one shot to reign supreme. As an Ole Miss fan, the last thing you want to see in this situation is that kid's chuckling mug.
Black on black on black baby! And throw in some gold too! How about that massacre? A lot of people will throw this out as 'this is just what the Saints do at home'. They have a point. However, the two previous home wins this season were underwhelming at best. Two close wins over Minnesota and Tampa Bay is not what I would consider the norm. What this win does do, however, is give the Saints a chance to grab hold of first place this upcoming Thursday. A win in Carolina on a short week will restore my faith. As absolutely putrid as the NFC South has been, all you have to do is win it. Get in the playoffs and anything can happen.
That offense made my heart skip a beat. That's what the who dat nation is used to, and it has been missing most of the season. No turnovers was a welcome change. I said it before the season and it still holds true. Mark Ingram is a beast. The only two things holding him back are Sean Payton's play calling and injuries. He was running over would be tacklers like they were roadkill. Shaking off defenders like he was in the Taylor Swift video. Sticking his hand in people's face like they were being too loud during sex. Give me more Brandin Cooks long balls. I don't want it. I need it. Put that 4.3 speed to work. Also good to see Jimmy make some big plays. He is clearly not 100%, but he was still a stud. I know the dunks have been banished by Fuhrer Goodell, but the NFL isn't a no flex zone yet. Those biceps get my heart rate going, no homo.
I couldn't believe my eyes. A pass rush? Interceptions? Pinch me. Is this 2013? So refreshing. This defense has been gouged all year. Their stubbornness in the red zone, and eventual domination in the second half turned this game from a shootout to a blow out. Credit is due where credit is due. A loss at home could have been backbreaking, especially playing on the road on a short week in four days. There's levels to this shit, and Cameron Jordan must have had the cheat codes. His game went from 0 to 100 real fucking quick. I know you can call holding every play, but Junior Galette gets held more than a new born baby. I swear it's three times a game where i say 'well that's definitely a hold' to no avail. Also, I think it's time to burn my Vaccaro jersey tee. While his play has picked up a bit in recent weeks he is still missing a ton of tackles. His noticeable drop in play correlates too strongly to my purchase.
Some people will say the lopsided nature of the win had to do with Rodgers limping gingerly back to the huddle in the 3rd quarter. To that I say, suck it. Fuck Aaron Rodgers. I don't care about Aaron Rodgers, or his smug little smirk, or his poor wittle hamstwing. Grow up Aaron, no one feels bad for you. Eat turf you fairy.
I would be remised if I didn't mention the things that were worrisome. The tacking just simply has to get better. I know Eddie Lacy is an absolute Mack truck of a human being, but you just can't let him, or anyone, get that many yards after contact. There were still some play calling issues. Turning it over on downs early in the 3rd quarter could have been disastrous. Sometimes on third and short it's as simple as giving the ball to Ingram. Payton really over thought it with the fullback call.
Whatever. On to Carolina. Bring on Scam and his feminine wardrobe. Hope that leg is all healed. One step too slow and Junya is putting ya in a body bag. Bring the same effort, and the same execution, and the boys should be heading back to NOLA in sole possession of first place. Yeah, it will be in the worst division possibly in history. Not my chair, not my problem.
Who Dat Say Dey Gon' Beat Dem Saints?!?
For all those non-believers….
Yahoo- Plenty of perks come your way when you're a Super Bowl-winning quarterback, one of them being endorsement offers for every product under the sun. And when your performance outstrips your paycheck and you're making about one-twentieth of what some of your peers make, well, some of those endorsement checks start to look pretty tasty.
Poor Russell Wilson. First his teammates don't think he's 'black enough', whatever that means. Now his own management is trying to take money out his pocket. If I were Russell Wilson I would tell the Seahawks to piss off. This is hard for me to say, because I really dislike Wilson, but he has earned every endorsement opportunity he has been given. He should milk everyone of them for all they are worth.
Think about this. Russell Wilson is making substantially less than a million dollars to play professional football this year. Yes, the SuperBowl winning quarterback is making the equivalent of NFL peanuts. To paint a better picture, mediocre quarterbacks like Colin Kaepernick and Andy Dalton just received contracts that pay them upwards of 20 million dollars a year. In case you have forgotten, they have won zero SuperBowls combined. In fact, Andy Dalton doesn't even have a playoff win.
That's what happens when you are undervalued in the draft. You get paid less and have to earn that big money contract. I understand that. Russell understands that. That's why he is attaching his name to each and every product he can. Make up for the dollars his contract lacks with endorsement money. This isn't a new concept.
What is a new concept is an athlete getting criticized for doing so. Peyton Manning has a monster contract. Drew Brees as well. Both are basically a part of every other commercial on television. I haven't heard a word muttered about it. I really can't remember this being an issue with any athlete ever. It's not like the time he devotes to commercials is taking away from his play on the field. Despite some recent losses, Wilson has been far from the problem.
This is why Seattle can't have nice things. They scoop up an absolute gem of a quarterback in the THIRD round of the draft, he leads them to a Super Bowl, then everything begins to fall to shit. Percy Harvin starts punching teammates, Marshawn Lynch starts bitching about money, people start questioning Russell's ethnic perception, and now management starts telling their quarterback how he can and can't prosper off his accomplishments. How about management worries more about the actual problems in the locker room, and less about the non-problem child who goes about his business professionally?
Regardless of your thoughts on Gary Nova, watching him lay on the turf in Lincoln, Nebraska was a disheartening sight. I have crucified him. I have waxed poetic about him. It really depends on the week. No matter what your thoughts are on him, he is the best option Rutgers has at quarterback. Honestly, its really not even that close. Sure, Laviano had some nice plays with his legs in the second half. When push comes to shove teams aren't going to allow him to roll out and run 46 yards on a quarterback keeper every week. We need Gary healthy and fast.
There's been a ton of criticism directed towards Kyle Flood for the situation in which Nova got hurt. Rutgers, a team that usually runs out the clock in similar situations, aired the ball out. Attempting to go 94 yards in the last minute of the half. I refuse to put this on Flood. Was it the smartest decision in the world? No. Was it extremely improbable that Rutgers put up points on the drive? Definitely. However, you can't play scared. I have been clamoring for Rutgers to stop doing it for years, so I'm not going to be a hypocrite when a freak accident happens. Nova could get hurt on any given play this season, that's the nature of football. Rutgers was down 14 in a game where their defense was shaky and Nebraska was receiving the ball after the half. The difference between 21-7 and 21-10 or 21-14 is worth the risk of throwing the ball. No one expected Nova to get hurt. Hindsight is 20/20. People would be talking about how big Flood's cojones are had they put up points there.
The last few games have proved one major thing. The Knights need to get bigger on the offensive and defensive lines. Games are won in the trenches. The smaller quicker players aren't going to cut it. There's no short term fix to that. It's an issue that needs to be addressed in recruiting in the coming years. Rutgers was constantly pushed 2 yards downfield on defense. Those big cornfed honkies were dominating Rutgers up front. The offensive line was getting no push. I don't think it's a matter of lack of talent, but rather a matter of size and strength.
The secondary. Oh God, the fucking secondary. If the line isn't going to get push up front, the one thing Rutgers is going to have to depend on is the secondary and linebackers making tackles when they are there to be made. Lorenzo Waters looked like a fish out of water. I have played better safety on Madden and I couldn't tackle a chicken in a phone booth on Madden. By count, I think he missed 300 tackles yesterday. Yes, making those tackles is going to be much harder job when the defensive line is getting no penetration. That's no excuse for missing tackles by 5 feet.
Hats off to Ameer Abdullah. I hate giving any sort of credit to the opponent. It's just not in my nature. I got to give it to him though. Dude is a beast. He has monster holes to run through, but he is extremely slick in the open field. Quite frankly, he made the Rutgers defense look silly. They didn't need any help Ameer, they could have done that themselves. Just looking at the picture below makes me want to toss up my shrimp tacos.
Please get healthy Gary. It's Badger hunting season next week, and you got the sawed off shotgun.
First of all, very cool scene pre game. Ottawa Strong. Rest in peace to the victims and thoughts and prayers to their families.
Second of all, whewwwwwwww. Thank God. Needed that one. The Devils have not brought their best hockey the last two games. It would be hard to say they didn't steal a point of the other night against Dallas. Ya know, before inevitably losing another shootout in anti climactic fashion. Whatever. At this point I am just resigned to a shootout being a loss. Surprise me one time Devils. Just one time. They had some good stretches tonight, mostly in the second period. Honestly, probably should have had more than 2 goals in the second. Pretty sure they hit another 45 posts tonight.
The penalty kill is a fucking abomination. Ready for a little numbers game. The Devils were 1/3 of the way into the season last year when the 11th power play goal against them was scored. This year it took 8 games. For you mathematically handicapped that's over one power play goal against a game. Insanity. I wish I knew how to fix it. Volchenkov would definitely help, but I was all for buying him out so I don't want to be a hypocrite. Reality is, Volchenkov only got bought out over Salvador because he was making more money. Smart business decision. One thing is evident, Greene has been bad on the penalty kill. He hasn't been too much better anywhere else, but it's increasingly more evident shorthanded.
Elias must have had a hell of an offseason. I'm not sure what they put in the vodka in the Czech Republic, but it must be pretty strong. No way you can convince me Patty hasn't been drunk since game one. At 4-2-2 I am content with the start, but we are going to need are best players to be our best players sooner rather than later. Elias, Greene, and Salvador all have letters on their chest. Right now they are doing the farthest thing from leading by example.
I'm not sure this is a fixable problem because of the lack of center depth. However, I would like to see Henrique with Elias a bit more. They definitely have some chemistry together, and maybe Rico can light a fire under Elias' drunk ass. Henrique is easily one of the most talented players on the team. Kid's got hands. Unfortunately, he needs a lot more than hands to diddle himself waiting for Clowe and Ryder to get into the zone. Went from playing with Kovalchuk and Parise to Clowe and Ryder. God bless that beautiful man for signing long term. I swear Ryder only has so many career goals because he's 40 minutes late to the play and the defense forgets he even exists.
Amazing how the 4th line actually has possession time when Tootoo is nursing a sore foot. Definitely a coincidence though. DEFINITELY. He'll be back in the lineup when healthy. YUCK.
I love how involved the defense has been in the scoring. Love it. It is a bit worrisome that our offense is having trouble netting some. Hopefully it balances itself out. I'm so gay for Seversen it is unbelievable. My heart flutters when he winds up. I'm only half kidding. He is so crafty beyond his years. It is honestly making the rest of the defense look bad. Merrill is Paul Martin-lite. I swear he does something once a game where I forget that he isn't Paul Martin. I mean that in a good way. Especially for a second year player.
Last but not least. Jagr. Jag tits. What a beautiful, beautiful bastard. Let him play until he's 60. I don't care. Love his nonchalant cellies after OT goals. Just business as usual for 68.
Way to keep 'em at bay Schneids. Literally and figuratively.
RightWingWatch- Conservative columnist and former Reagan administration aide Douglas MacKinnon is out with a new book calling for Southern states to secede…again.
So I guess this confirms what I already knew. Anyone can be a published author. There's a lot of books out there that revolve entirely around ludicrous ideas, but I think this one kind of takes the cake. It's almost impressive how passionate this guy is against gay rights. I obviously don't agree with him. However you have to respect his devotion to the cause. Got to stand for something right? It doesn't matter that 99% of the country doesn't give a shit about homosexuality anymore. This guy will never give in to the masses. Not only that, he's taking an entire region with him. Might want to check how many soldiers you got before you head into war with homosexuality.
The irony of this is that this guy is conservative. This is probably the least conservative idea ever. An ENTIRE book about seceding. Going so far as to naming his new land 'Reagan'. Can't say this guy lacks originality. This book should be called 'The Jacked Up Psycho Babble Of A Hardcore Right Wing Extremist'. And when I say 'jacked up' I mean Jack Daniels. No way this guy wrote this book without the help of a couple bottles of whiskey.
I would think even those that agree with his foundation are like 'shit, he's making us look bad'. Even Ronald Reagan is turning over in his grave. Smart move naming it after the dead guy. I would think the figurehead of your 'movement' chastising the entire idea would be self sabotage. Can't do that from beyond the grave.
You have to love the quote about Texas. He basically said, 'I'm not racist, but Texas can't come because they have too many Mexicans'. Just par for the course with this guy. Definitely gives you an idea of the type of person we are dealing with. Not that his picture doesn't already speak a thousand words. Reagan really gave a solid background check for his administrative aides.
Not to get too graphic, but just for argument's sake. What is a more outlandish idea, two grown men engaging in anal sex or THREE states seceding from the United States? Seems like too much of a process for an outdated religious view. I don't exactly agree with everything Obama has done since being in office, but I am not about to de-Americanize myself for it. Not devoting an entire book to making New Jersey it's own country because I don't like the tax rate.
P.S. Florida can take a hike whenever they choose. I can say with about 40% certainty it is the worst state ever. I would trade Florida and a state to be named later for Zimbabwe in a heartbeat.
SBNation- In our quest to give you what every single person in the world thinks about the offensive pass interference call that essentially ended last week's marquee matchup between Notre Dame and Florida State, we bring you this important update from former President Bill Clinton.
Awww, HORSESHIT!!! Bad call or not (it probably was). I don't want to hear Slick Willie sticking up for Notre Dame. Is this not America? Is this not sports? Notre Dame is one of those teams that you either irrationally love or irrationally hate, and you can never stray from that. I think we know which side of the fence I am on. If I needed a liver transplant and the Notre Dame Medical School sent one over I would punt it off the George Washington Bridge. Then I would use my last breathe to spit in a mason jar and have it sent back to them.
I don't care how they lost. I'm a Rutgers fan, I wake up expecting to lose in painful ways. Boo-fucking-hoo. Guess what Notre Dame. You deserve to lose in such ways. Fuck the Fighting Irish Midgets and their holier than thou attitude. Is there a more pretentious group of assholes in the world than Notre Dame fans. They probably think the fountain on campus runs on Holy water. Granted, I don't even know if they have a fountain on campus. The beauty of that is neither does the 99.9% of their fan base that neither went to, or even visited, the school. How about this South Bend? Rudy sucked. Way to celebrate mediocrity.
Just one time Notre Dame. Just one time admit to me that you have moron student athletes just like everyone else. Admit to me that occasionally you have a cornerback skip Saturday night mass to blow lines off a stripper's ass cheek. You can't even tell a Irish fan that some of their kids cheat in class without them giving you the 'father,son,holy spirit' like a highfalutin fuckbag. How about this South Bend? Rudy sucked. Way to celebrate mediocrity.
C'mon Bill. You can't be feeling some typa' way about Notre Dame. You just broke Jameis' little heart. I can't speak for Winston's political views, but I'm pretty certain the only presidents he knows are Clinton and Obama. You guys are his favorite. If Clinton was being recruited for football he would 100% choose Florida State. Has a person ever fit a college culture better? Sex scandals and flat out lies to the media? It's a match made in heaven. Bet your ass Teflon Bill loves himself some crab legs. Clinton was saying 'fuck her right in the pussy' before it was popular. I am shocked he didn't trademark that. Be better Billy Boy. Do better.
Now cue it up….
I am not going to sit here and debate Chico's proficiency as a color commentator. Everyone knows he isn't the quickest gazelle in the herd. He was wrong almost as often as he was right. He would tell you that himself. There was always a noticeable Devils' bias. No denying that. It's part of what made him great though. Whether he should have had a microphone in front of him or not, Chico was a culmination of us, the fans. Chico was your drunk Uncle. He was your old senile grandfather. He was the fan behind you that had too much to say with too little knowledge. He was the random guy next to you that you high five after a big goal. At the end of the day, Chico made the Prudential Center, and the Devils' broadcasts entertaining.
Were some things he say cringeworthy? Absolutely. I think people are letting the memories of the last 3 years without Doc cloud their judgement. Doc Emrick and Chico Resch were one of the most captivating combinations in broadcasting. They weren't always right. It wasn't always pretty. It wasn't always the most intelligent of formulas. However, if you had to describe it one word it would be entertaining. Chico saying something ridiculous and Doc asking him leading questions trying to push him down the right path. You may not be a fan of either person, but I dare you to say they were boring. First and foremost, they were friends more than colleagues, and that showed in their work together.
I would be lying if I said I always liked listening to Chico. In fact, my mood towards him would be drastically differ depending on the outcome of the game. When the Devils were winning I would sit and laugh alone with, and at, him. When the Devils were losing and I was already on edge I wanted to Van Gogh myself. That's how sports should be. It's what being a fan is about. Letting the highs be too high and the lows be too low. Resch embraced that. Sometimes the Devils would be up 1-0 in a game in the middle of November and would swear they were making a Cup run.
The fact that Chico, a mediocre color commentator, got a retirement ceremony last night is a testament to who he is outside of the broadcast booth. Sure, he had his great moments inside that booth, but that's not the main reason. He was one of those people that would stop and talk to anyone. Anytime he wasn't talking on the air, he was talking to fans. Mingling with season ticket holders. Stuffing a hot dog down his gullet. I got to say, I was skeptical when they announced they were having a ceremony for him, until he stepped to the mic. If anyone present last night wasn't smiling the entire time Chico blessed the mic they don't have a soul. It just felt right. It's not his wit, or his timing. I honestly don't know what it is. The aura Chico carries with him, and has carried around the Devils for the last few decades, is one that deserves to be celebrated. I am glad he got his moment in the sun.
"I remember going to a fan club meeting and I said, “I’m sure that God put Chico in my path to make my life better because he’s the closest thing to a saint that I’ve met.” And it got back to him and Chico saw me the next day and he says. “Oh Doc, don’t say that. I’m by far not a saint.” Well, to me you were." -Mike 'Doc' Emrick
“Well, I’ll tell you. Working with Doc for a lot of years, he told me, ‘The one thing you can control is enthusiasm. Sell what you’ve got.’ If it’s a cross-ice pass and a good one, he told me to say, ‘Hey, what a cross-ice pass! He saucered that thing through the neutral zone!’ I look at myself like a Phil Rizzuto. I’m quirky. I’m not real smooth. I’m insightful because I was a goalie. I can see things that really dictate why the goal was scored, but I’m not overly witty in coming up with original clichés. I kind of just played it straight up, and being with Doc helped. I would have quirky stuff that wasn’t really clear, then Doc would come in and clean it up and add humor, and then we could laugh. And we were really good friends. And Cangy and I have started to develop that, too.”
-Glenn 'Chico' Resch
P.S. Just another instance of the Devils classing it up. They bought him a fucking boat. More importantly, When Chico won a cup with Islanders in the 80's he never got a day with it. The Devils and the NHL have arranged for him to have a day with the Stanley Cup. Oozing class everywhere. Nice work Lou.
Huffington Post- In a heated discussion with presenter Evan Davis that ultimately descended into a lot of shouting, Brand was queried over whether or not he was giving credence to conspiracy theories by discussing how the explosion at Twin Towers was "controlled" in his new book."We have to remain open-minded to any kind of possibility." Brand said when asked if the September 11 disaster had been orchestrated by the American government.
"I think it is interesting at this time when we have so little trust in our political figures, where ordinary people have so little trust in their media, we have to remain open-minded to any kind of possibility," he said.
"Do you trust the American government? Do you trust the British government? What I do think is very interesting is the relationship that the Bush family have had for a long time with the bin Laden family."
Put him on the list. Once you even step one foot down the '911 was a conspiracy' path you officially don't exist to me. Yup. We crashed our own planes into our own buildings. Killed our own citizens. Cost ourselves millions of dollars in clean-up and rebuilding. All of that just for the government to establish control over the American people. Newsflash, the government already controls us. You don't have to commit mass homicide to reinforce the dichotomy between society and government. The people that believe in these theories say the general public are 'sheep'. Get your hippie malarkey out of my face. We can't even figure out healthcare and taxes, now all the sudden we are able to pull an Oceans 11 type heist of America's innocence? Get the fuck out of here. Here's a hypothesis for you, you've smoked too much PCP. Anyone that truly believes any of these theories should be banished to a foxhole in Afganistan. We should hold a 'Conspiracy Theorist Convention' on an island somewhere and just smoke the place out with Ebola.
Russell Brand isn't totally wrong. The government and the media do manipulate the truth. That's what's happening with Ebola. Without a doubt the vast amounts of media coverage it is getting is causing way more of a stir than the actually disease has. We don't really know anything when it comes to what goes on behind the scenes with the US government. However, I like to believe that they aren't capable of killing significant amounts of the general public while keeping a straight face. Call me an optimist. It just helps me sleep better at night. In fact, if the government is behind every tragedy known to man, I would prefer not to know. I don't need to be crawling around my apartment in an Army helmet and a gas mask thinking every plane that flies overhead is destined to land in my kitchen. Ignorance is bliss.
I don't even know why I was surprised that Russell Brand is a conspiracy theorist. He strikes me as one of those actors that has the exact same personality on screen and off screen. No way that guy doesn't do enough drugs per day to kill a Clydesdale. At the very least, his marijuana consumption rivals that of a Jamaican beach bum with glaucoma. He probably spent the 12 hours prior to this interview counting unicorns and perusing YouTube channels for 9/11 videos. 'Tis unfortunate when people with too little knowledge and too much to say are given a platform. I give the conspirators credit though. The internet is a powerful place. If you're gullible and watch one of those videos you can definitely be convinced that we're all just government pawns.
Huffington Post- While women in England, Scotland and Wales who need an abortion can have the procedure carried out on the NHS, for free, with all the support they need at an extremely difficult time in their lives, women in Northern Ireland are faced with an unenviable choice: Fly to England for an abortion at a private clinic which can cost up to £2,000, or continue with a pregnancy that could have a severe long term impact on their physical and/or mental health.
Kind of weird how Pro-Life and Pro-Choice both sound so completely positive, yet they are drastically different philosophies. Regardless, this is insane. Is Northern Ireland just a century behind the rest of the world? Women who are raped, pregnant from incest, or whose children are destined for physical and mental handicaps all have to go through with the birth. This really begs the question why does anyone live in Northern Ireland? Guys that don't pull out fast enough are automatically fathers. Women who skip the pill are mothers. That's nuts.
I am not saying I am a big advocate of abortion. Perfect world, no one would ever have to have one. Unfortunately, we are all far from perfect and do drastically stupid shit. I mean, Ireland is the drinking capital of world. The accidents: babies ratio is probably far and away the highest in the world.
I do consider myself pro-choice though. If that means that no mother's are having their uncle's children then that is fine by me. If that means that one less rapist is a daddy then I will sign up for that. When you think about it, the end result of that scenario is guaranteed to be fucked up. If a fetus has to be killed to save a child from a 100% chance of a long, inevitably miserable life then I am totally on board.
Even if you are pro-life, wouldn't you want to get out of Northern Ireland? The government mandating what you do with your own body just doesn't sit right with me. If the American government outlawed masturbation I would be on the first plane to the British Virgin Islands.
P.S. This is totally cheating in the argument. I would totally change my tune if some lady was waving a plastic fetus in my face. That doesn't make her right. Such a chick move. Can't just lose with dignity.
I live in one of the wealthiest neighborhoods in the country, but on one of the more “modest” streets—mostly doctors and lawyers and family business owners. (A few blocks away are billionaires, families with famous last names, media moguls, etc.) I have noticed that on Halloween, what seems like 75 percent of the trick-or-treaters are clearly not from this neighborhood. Kids arrive in overflowing cars from less fortunate areas. I feel this is inappropriate. Halloween isn’t a social service or a charity in which I have to buy candy for less fortunate children. Obviously this makes me feel like a terrible person, because what’s the big deal about making less fortunate kids happy on a holiday? But it just bugs me, because we already pay more than enough taxes toward actual social services. Should Halloween be a neighborhood activity, or is it legitimately a free-for-all in which people hunt down the best candy grounds for their kids?
—Halloween for the 99 Percent
So yeah. This lady is just flat out racist. I really don't see any way around that conclusion. The fact that she even asks this means she's the not the friendliest of folks. It's 2014, no one knows all their neighbors anymore. You might be friendly with the houses next to you, but there is no way you know every kid in your neighborhood. That's old school shit. Which means the only way to differentiate between locals and non-locals all dressed up in costumes is skin color. She basically should have said 'I don't want to give minorities candy, what should I do?'
I don't even know what the most ridiculous part of this story is. The justification for why she doesn't want to give out candy to the 'poor kids', or the fact that she actually seeked counsel on the subject? At no point in that irrational, incoherent rant did it ever occur to her that what she was writing sounded awful? This woman brings up taxes and shit and compares them to an economy size bag of candy. How much does a family have to spend on halloween candy? $20 bucks?
I really don't think she understands how little sense she is making. She does realize that giving candy to wealthy children and poor children is providing the exact the same service, doesn't she? These kids aren't panhandling outside of Saks Fifth, they are asking for a bite size Crunch bar. Of course this makes you feel like a horrible person lady. Horrible people are supposed to feel like horrible people. That's how being a terrible person works. You try to justify to yourself that you have a soul and then when you lay your head down at night you realize that you're just a shitty racist. It's no secret that kids hunt down the best candy areas. That's not a rich/poor divide. It's a good candy/bad candy divide.
P.S. 'Halloween for the 99 percent' is such a preposterously pretentious name that I can't not laugh at it.
P.P.S. "Kids arrive in overflowing cars from less fortunate areas." Yup, totally Mexicans.
NBC- A substitute teacher in D.C. accused of having sex with a student on her first day at the school pleaded not guilty.
Let's be honest. Substitute teachers may be the least respected people on the planet earth. The blow job she gave this kid may be the most productive thing a substitute has ever done in the history of teaching. Substitute teachers are basically given the Charlie Brown teacher treatment. I'm not sure I have ever listened to one single word they have ever said. It's all just white noise and mumbling.
That said, If you want to make your mark as a sub, this might be the most genius way to do it. The first hurdle is getting the attention of your students. Boys will do anything you want if it results in even the slightest possibility of sexual satisfaction. This phenomenon holds true from puberty through death. The power of the pussy is a power like none other. You blow a kid day one and the rest of them are all ears from now until you retire.
A females favorite thing to do is to gossip. I'm pretty sure females just gather up with their girlfriends and discuss how much they hate other girls. The best way to get on a girl's bad side is to have sexual relations with a prospective target. That may seem contrary to the goal. However, females pay the most attention to people they hold a grudge against. They take the phrase 'keep your friends close and enemies closer' quite literally. You want a classroom full of chicks to hang on to your every word? Make sure they all despise you.
Bold maneuver. I like it. High risk, high reward. Let's face it. If this chick is blowing kids day one there was no way she was going to be able to hold off until tenure kicked in. Might as well just go for broke.
P.S. Another example of smart phones and technology ruining everything. Can't just tell your friends you got a blowie from teach. Now a days, you need HD footage. Sad really. Could have really 'milked' the situation for all it was worth...
CNN- For 18 years, thousands of students at the prestigious University of North Carolina took fake "paper classes," and advisers funneled athletes into the program to keep them eligible, according to a scathing independent report released Wednesday.
I know this should piss me off. I know I should be clamoring that UNC has had a decided advantage over all other universities for the better part of two decades. I just can't bring myself to do it. I made an agreement with myself long ago that I don't care what goes on amongst college class rooms, as long as the on field/on court product is up to par. It is great that Rutgers' athletics always ranks above a large majority of other universities when it comes to academics. It is something to be proud of. However, I would trade that in for 2.0's and conference championships in a heartbeat. That may be disconcerting, but those are the facts. The only statistics that universities, and their fans, care about are W's and dollar signs, not GPA's and graduation rates.
Let's be real, every major school has cases of this. During Ray Rice's senior year there was a rumor that he handed in an exam that simply said "Ray Ray don't take tests". I thought it was funny then, and I would be lying if I said I don't think it is funny now. College sports is a business. BIG business to be exact. The power of the almighty dollar is much more alluring than running a completely clean program. Athletics outweigh academics and carry universities financially. If you need anymore proof look at the application numbers the year after a university has a good sports season. I applied to St. Joseph's the year after Jameer Nelson and Delonte West carried them to an undefeated regular season. Applications had skyrocketed from the previous year. These universities can't let something as silly as negligent student athletes hold them back.
For the most part, you can skate through college if need be. There are plenty of joke classes. Plenty of classes that you don't have to attend. Plenty of classes that only require you to write papers. Through word of mouth and a little research you can find ways to fill your schedule without burdening yourself with too much of a workload. For fuck's sake, they didn't have to invent fake classes for me to 'study' Witchcraft and Magic, Sociology of Sport, and Sociology of Women.
I think the most concerning thing about this story is that the university was responsible. I don't need athletes to be the smartest kids on campus, but let's not create a faux ring of classes just so they can pass. If you can't find a way to get yourself a 2.0 while taking garbage classes then that should be on you, not the university. It's also concerning that it was so institutionalized and widespread. When a scandal includes that many people, that information is bound to make it's way into the wrong hands. It's a minor miracle it managed to go unpunished this long. It's almost like UNC thought academic fraud was so much a fabric of the college landscape that they didn't need to keep it close to the vest.
I am not saying I agree with colleges making their decisions based on the best interest of it's sports teams. I am just saying that it is something we have known for awhile now, and it isn't subject to change. Education may be synonymous with universities, but at the end of the day one philosophy will always prevail. C.R.E.A.M.
ESPN- The spot, which was directed by Spike Lee, ended with the words "Chevrolet celebrates Mo'ne Davis and those who remind us that anything is possible."
Mo'ne Davis may be paid for appearing in the Chevy commercial without impacting her NCAA eligibility," NCAA spokeswoman Emily James said in a statement.
NCAA guidelines are extremely strict. You may question the rules, but not the ways in which they are implemented. Wait…except if it is a 13 year old girl playing a sport that is predominately male? Is that what is being pushed here? That Mo'ne Davis, a girl that reached fame by smoking heaters past a bunch of prepubescent boys, is above the rules?
Johnny Manziel and Jameis Winston, two players that gained unprecedented Heisman prestige as Freshman, can't sign their own name on footballs and helmets for monetary benefit. Shabazz Napier, a national championship winning point guard, is deprived the nourishment to sustain his active lifestyle. However, Davis can appear in a commercial and get compensated for it? I don't mean to turn this into a gender issue. It kind of is though. Would a 13 year old boy who dominated the Little League World Series be above NCAA restrictions? Doubtful.
I understand how important the ad is. I have no issue with female empowerment. It was a delight to watch Mo'ne dominate the male competition on the diamond. It is unlikely, but a female participating in a professional sport, such as baseball, would be a grandiose accomplishment. All the power to her. My issue is with the powers that be. The NCAA. Let these student athletes earn money. I take that back. Let them be compensated for all the money they already do earn. The money that lines the pockets of university officials. If there is a market out there for commercials, or memorabilia, or appearance fees then they should be subject to collecting, at the very least, a portion of that. College athletics is the only big business where the 'employees' aren't a major beneficiary of the work done.
I don't have an issue with Davis making some money. She created the public image she is prospering off of through hard work and commitment. I just don't understand why other athletes, at a much higher level than Davis, can't do the same. Players ,like Todd Gurley, are having their name dragged through the mud, while we sit here and celebrate Mo'ne Davis for doing the very same thing. How's that for a double standard?
Coffee And Alcohol Have The Opposite Effect On Your Liver, And I Am Basically A Picture Of Perfect Health
FoodBeast- There’s now even more good news about drinking coffee, especially if you enjoy a good cocktail every now and then … or more, if we are being really honest.
We all know that our liver takes a beating when we drink alcohol. Now, a new study shows that compounds in coffee help to reduce damage and inflammation in the liver.
I should have started drinking coffee a lonnng time ago. I guess this means I don't have to drink anything else besides beer and coffee for the foreseeable future. I'm trying to live a healthy lifestyle after all. Maybe mix in an irish coffee and really keep that liver at equilibrium. Take that vegans. Enjoy your gluten sensitivity you pheasants. I'll just sit here and throw back a mug of black and a tall boy. Nutrition on a hundred, thousand, trillion. I don't know about you guys, but my enzyme game has been hot the last years. I was probably carrying a liver the size of twin babies in college. That's why I had that preggo belly.
You think it's a coincidence I shed a bunch of pounds post college. Gym my ass. I got a little sip of that nectar and it evened me out. Slim liver, slim waist. That's the name of the game. However, this news really kind of explains why I am not dead yet. Guess that 'lifeblood' is a much more literal term than I ever imagined. Kind of fortunate I just accidentally balanced my enzymes because the real world is tiring. I'm not sure if I cheers to this article with a cup of joe or a pint of your finest.
I guess the real question is when do bars and coffee shops merge? With that and the legalization of marijuana we'll basically be Amsterdam. We can replace that halfbreed Dunkin' Donuts/Baskin Robbins with a Starbucks and a dive bar. No doubt it will do more business. Especially since booze and coffee is apparently vastly more healthy for you than donuts and ice cream.
USA Today- Florida State head coach Jimbo Fisher’s wife, Candi, shared a photo of their son Trey on his way to school for ‘Superhero Day.’
I have no problem with this move at all. In fact, what else would you expect? Of course the head coaches' kid dressed up as the starting quarterback. The only issue I have is that this costume sucks. It's the equivalent of throwing on a Batman shirt and calling yourself 'The Dark Knight'. Bullshit. Give me something here Trey. Carry a crab leg or two. Stuff some lawsuits in your back pocket. Rock a Sharpie behind your ear. If this kid didn't stand on at least one table and scream 'fuck her right in the pussy' there is no longer any sanctity in costume wearing. I need realism Trey. Anyone can just wear a football jersey. Don't forget, the most non-politically correct costumes are always the best.
If were being honest with ourselves then Jameis Winston isn't a bad 'superhero' to have. Sure, he's got a laundry list transgressions. He'll work his way past those. Let us not forget that in a year Jameis Winston will be in the NFL. Dumb as shit and rich as fuck. There are definitely worse lives to live...
USA Today- “I’ve been called the N-word so many times this year,” Gardner said. “One guy told me I was the N-word, and said I know N-words can’t play quarterback. And I was like, are we not past this? Say what you want about my skill, but come on.”
This isn't a new issue. Athletes have been getting bombarded with anonymous racial slurs since Twitter became a social medium. I am fully aware that while it is not 1800, racists are still prevalent in today's society. Racism, both conscious and subconscious, is an issue that all minorities have to deal with. It is only expanded by a person's popularity and outreach.
The thing that I don't understand that is how people like Michigan coach Brady Hoke get fair and (mostly) rational criticisms, while Devon Gardner gets a barrage of slurs. Like, the best insult a person can think of for Gardner after how poorly he has played this season is the 'N' word? I could think of like 1,000 insulting things to say that actually apply to his play on the football field.
I don't condone racial epithets under any circumstance. However, if scumbags out there are going to do it, maybe save it for professionals. College kids are between 18-22 years old. They don't get paid for their hard work and dedication. Shit, they can't even sell their own name for a couple bucks. The last thing they should have to worry about is a bunch of cocksuckers sending them racist hate mail because they threw an interception or two on Saturday. You don't think these athletes want to win?
Really, it's a shame that something that is supposed to be for entertainment can invoke such a harsh and volatile reaction. Don't get me wrong, I insult athletes all the time. I may even wish ill will upon them. However, that is mostly hyperbole. Calling a football a pussy is a little different than using a word that has such a treacherous and storied past. It's too bad that this issue still presents itself on a semi-regular basis. As helpful and informative as social media can be, it gives cowards way too big of a platform for their prejudice.
Bro Bible- The site appears to be crashing due to all the traffic it’s getting, but here’s the first page. It reads: “I want to dedicate this site to you to show you that I’m truly sorry and serious about changing for the better. I love you more than life itself and would give anything for another chance.”
Oh man, we have all been put into a position where we do some real dumb shit over a ex. Things so pathetic and sad that we rarely ever mention them or admit to doing them. With that said, I am pretty sure making an entire website devoted to your ex girlfriend of 4 months takes the cake.
We can ignore the fact that creating a website and being obsessed with a girl creates the complete opposite reaction you would want from her. That goes without saying. This has got to fuck up his love life going forward though too, right? This page has gone insanely viral. Almost crashing due to web traffic. His name is attached to it. Her name is attached to it. Anyway, how do you enter back into the dating world when you're the psycho website guy? At that point you are only pulling equally as crazy chicks. Definitely possible, but mildly horrifying.
I think the major take away from this is that this guy has no friends or family? You don't start up a website and go viral enough to crash it without your peers knowing about it. How has one of his friends not launched his computer into oncoming traffic? How has not one of them called him up and said "bro, you're kinda being a fag"? If you want to Facebook stalk, or actually stalk, your ex girlfriend there is not much your friends can do about it. Maybe tell you not to? Chastise you for it? At the end of the day, if you want to do it, you are going to do it. However, when you reach devoted website territory there has to be a call to arms. Got to get the friends and family together for a mutiny. Take back the web! We are way past an intervention, that much is clear.
Full disclosure, she looks kinda hot. Way to go idiot...
Michael Sam Cut From Cowboys, Did Jerry Jones Sell His Soul To The Devil? Did He Even Have A Soul To Sell?
How about Jerry Jones having a year for himself? He's literally doing NOTHING different as an owner. The signing and subsequent releasing of Michael Sam is a testament to that. Jerry really milked that bone dry. Got all the sperm out of that whale. Get some good publicity from scooping up the gay guy, maybe sell a couple custom jerseys here or there. Anything for a buck and his name in the paper. Can't hate it, that's the American way. Equality = $$$.
Jerry just rollin' 7's this year. Everything he touches right now is hot hot heat. First, the Sam thing. Then he laughed off sexual assault charges. Basically threw like the equivalent of like $6 normal person money to make that shit disappear. Has there ever been less controversy surrounding the sexual misconduct of a major public figure? People basically just said 'Of course Jerry is getting strippers and hookers, non story'. There were even viral pictures of him in compromising positions and people just shrugged their shoulders and went about their day. Respect Jerry, respect.
Now, his perennially disappointing team is arguably the best team in the NFC and in competition for the best in the league. Demarco Murray must have stepped on his injury bug and flushed him down the toilet. So long little guy. Romo is limiting his mistakes, and their defense (minus Sean Lee) has been substantially better. Have people already forgotten how bad the Cowboys were supposed to be? I'm not talking 8-8 bad, I am talking Nicolas Cage in 'Ghost Rider' bad. It's maybe the biggest shocker of the season thus far.
Do we have an eye on Jerry's blood pressure? Can we hire someone to keep constant watch on that? I feel like the guy is a 3rd and long conversion away from a heart attack. The Cowboys performance, his hookers, and the undoubted use of cocaine and viagra? He is basically a ticking time bomb. Good for Jerry though. The guy deserves it…I guess. Or he is the complete opposite of deserving. The guy has been so bad at his job in recent years. Must be one of those 'so bad it's good' situations. Too bad Al Davis died before he reached that stage. Either way, can't argue with that face...
"Get my pills, it's gonna be a long night!"
Huffington Post- Fox News is discouraging young people from voting again, but this time the target is more specific: young women.
"The Five" co-host Kimberly Guilfoyle said Tuesday that young women should excuse themselves from voting in the upcoming midterm elections because they don't share the same "life experience" as older women and should just go back to playing around on Tinder and Match.com.
Oh shit, call Brooke Valentine and cue the hair pulling. There's about to be a, WHAT!?!….GIRL FIGHT! This chick's tone screams envy. When she says 'they are like healthy, and hot, and running around without a care in the world' it reeks of jealousy and malice. Don't worry sweet heart. You still look plenty hot to me. I totally would, especially if you're mad. Anger bang for the motherfuckin' win.
Anyway, I agree with the underlying principle of this women's' statements. However, disagree with the sexist angle she takes. I, personally, do not vote. I hate politics. I think. No. I know they are all corrupt. I don't know nearly enough about the hard hitting issues. Yeah, I get it. Every vote counts. That's the exact reason I choose to not fill out a ballet. Would you ask a blind man to describe the color red? Would you ask a vegetarian to suggest a steakhouse? Would you have Floyd Mayweather tutor you in English? No, on all counts. Why should people that don't have any knowledge on a subject have a say in it?
This isn't just me. I know there is a large percentage of people that just go out there and vote on issues they don't understand. These are mostly, but not exclusively, young people. How many people do you know that will argue republican versus democrat until your ears bleed? It's fucking nauseating. What are the chances that all your views align with a particular political party? That would be quite the coincidence, no? Chances are you are liberal in some respects and conservative other aspects. However, in 99% of political debates between amateur analysts (AKA uninformed dumbasses) you will argue for or against every single one of Obama's points. People just get very irrational and emotional when it comes to politics. I say to those people, fuck Joe the Plumber and fuck you. Chances are you don't know what you are voting for anyway.
Not sure where this lady was headed with her rant. Clearly, not a fan of the upcoming generation or our tendencies. Still pretty funny though. Coming in hot to the jugular with the Tinder burn. Take a Xanax and shut up lady, your bias is showing.
Now tuuuuuuurrrrrrn it uppppppp…...